Skip to main content

Why Do Women Bully Each Other at Work? [TheAtlantic.com]

 

The bitches, as Shannon saw it, came in three varieties. She categorized them on her personal blog, in a post titled “Beware the Female BigLaw Partner.”

First was the “aggressive bitch”—a certain kind of high-ranking woman at the firm where she worked who didn’t think twice about “verbally assaulting anyone.” When one such partner’s name appeared on caller ID, Shannon told me, “we would just freak out.”

Next was the two-faced “passive-aggressive bitch,” whose “subtle, semi-rude emails” hinted that “you really shouldn’t leave before 6:30.” She was arguably worse than the aggressive bitch, because you might never know where you stand.

Last but not least, the “tuned-out, indifferent bitch,” Shannon wrote, “is so busy, both with work and family, that they don’t have time for anything … This partner is not trying to be mean, but hey, they got assignments at midnight when they were associates. So you will too.

“There obviously are exceptions,” she added. “But there aren’t many.”



[For more of this story, written b y Olga Khazan, go to https://www.theatlantic.com/ma...orner-office/534213/]

Add Comment

Comments (2)

Newest · Oldest · Popular

Thanks for your comment, Cathy. I agree....I'm sure there were traumas underlying the negative behavior, and those traumas were exacerbated in a toxic work environment. And I think once you do the self-work, your tolerance for working in toxic environments drops to nearly zero...at least it did for me.

Interesting article. As I read it I kept considering were there traumas underlying the negative behavior women in business leadership roles were demonstrating? If we are going to ask high school students, "What happened to you" instead of "Why did you do that" when they exhibit negative behavior, why wouldn't we apply that anytime we see negative behavior?

Of course it is much more difficult to ask "What happened to you" when the you are on the receiving end of the negative behavior. However, this is why everyone has responsibility to explore their own trauma or "stuff" which has a triggering effect.  

In Don Ruiz's book, The Four Agreements (1997), he outlines four agreements everyone should make with him/herself. One of those agreements is, "Don't take anything personally". I believe we cannot make this agreement without doing our own, personal work on ourselves through self-care, exploring our own traumas and adversity, and understanding our own triggers. Until we do this self work it might be impossible to not take negative behavior from a supervisor personally.

Post
Copyright © 2023, PACEsConnection. All rights reserved.
×
×
×
×
Link copied to your clipboard.
×