Michael was not in New York on September 11, 2001. But for years afterwards, when an elevator opened at work, he would imagine people on fire rushing out, their screams filling the lobby. When he closed his eyes, he would sometimes see limbs trapped in rubble, unattended by their bodies. He was plagued by moments of violence and destruction that he had not witnessed. On sleepless nights, he would wander the streets of his neighborhood, trying to exorcise other people’s demons.
Michael, who asked that his last name be withheld for privacy, is a clinical psychologist who works in lower Manhattan. In the years after the World Trade Center attacks, he treated hundreds of patients with acute and post-traumatic stress disorder. But it took him a while to notice that while the mental health of his patients largely improved with each passing therapy session, his own was deteriorating. By 2004—jittery, depressed, and unable to sleep most nights—he began to suffer panic attacks for the first time in his life. Increasingly, he had to withdraw from social events and public spaces. He asked a colleague to prescribe sleep aids and antidepressants.
[For more of this story, written by Aaron Reuben, go to http://www.theatlantic.com/hea...ndary-trauma/420282/]
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