March 15,2021
Is There A Positive Side to Family Estrangement?
The answer to the above question is a resounding yes. Although, as Annie Wright observes in her article, “The Positive Side of Family Estrangement and Creating a Family of Choice many consider even approaching the idea that family estrangement can feel good to be against all they believe.
The fact is that family estrangement can mean peace of mind that the survivor hasn’t known their entire life as they become released from the fear and drama that their family of origin has wrought upon them.
There is no doubt that family estrangement is painful, and one needs to grieve, but after a time, it becomes clear that staying away from family means freedom, independence, and safety.
It is far safer for many survivors to remain away from their family of origins because they have been guilted, invalidated, gaslighted, verbally abused, and sometimes risk their physical health being in their presence.
The Best Way to Cope, Finding a Family of Choice
Coping with family estrangement, especially during the holidays, is tough for survivors to face alone. This is why it is vital to find and form a family of choice (FOC). A family of choice offers welcome support to help from people who have your wellbeing at heart.
To be clear, a family of choice need not be a literal family as society sees it. Instead, a FOC can is a group of friends or work acquaintances, anyone who wishes to support you or needs support themselves.
A family of choice doesn’t need to be large; in fact, there are no limitations to the size of a new family. The only requirement is that you gather together as a group of people who have each other’s love and share each other’s burdens. Not only this but at Christmas time, a family of choice will also share the joy the season brings.
Comments (2)