My father died by suicide this year. His death inspired me to learn how to ‘just be.’ (washingtonpost.com)

Nine months ago, I stood at my father’s burial trying to gather my thoughts before speaking about his life to family and friends. It was particularly difficult because I had arrived at a day I had been trying to prevent, and had feared, for a very long time. My dad had just ended his life. But then, as I was standing there searching for the words, I remembered an article I had read only seven days prior. It was about ways to help yourself feel safe in an insane world. And so I began by sharing what I had learned:

That “anxiety needs the future,” and “depression needs the past.”

Ever since that day, I have been thinking a lot about being present. I’ve been thinking about being centered, being grounded. In short, I’ve been thinking about … being. And I began wondering why it was so difficult to come up with a concrete meaning for what was perhaps the most basic verb in the English language, without consulting the online search-engine gods. And I worried: Had I forgotten what it was to just be?

Ironically, I think it’s when we constantly try to “be” too many things at once (or perhaps one astronomical thing) that we entirely forget how to exist with any amount of calmness and composure in the present moment. When stressed beyond our normal capacity, our minds scatter and it can feel like we aren’t even inhabiting our own body. We can end up spiraling out of control, and losing our sense of place and time and self. We land somewhere dark and frightening and terrible. And it’s then, when we get to the very bottom of that downward spiral, that we think it might be better simply “not to be.” Because at that point, the thought of being anything at all has become unbearable.

So, in the spirit of National Suicide Prevention Month, I thought I’d share how I go about keeping anxiety and depression at bay. Yes, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about just being. But more than that, I’ve been putting it into practice. I’ve learned how to quiet my mind and focus on the present moment. I meditate, breathe and practice yoga. And building from that, I write, read, run, and do all the things I’ve always enjoyed.

To read more of Dana Mich's article, please click here.