About six months ago I started a conversation with two of my fellow ACE (Adverse Childhood Experience) Connection friends about the need for a National Platform to expose our network to the general public. As will happen, life and work can get in the way sometimes that keeps an idea from coming to fruition.
Now, six months later a door has opened that may not be able to be shut again. Sexual harassment in the celebrity world was the key that opened that door. Yes, it has started a wave of media coverage because our twisted world finds anything to do with celebrity exciting and interesting. Yet, my goal as The Greatful Dad has always been to be an advocate for children who do not have a voice.
So I am now looking for help and guidance to kick down the door of shame and vulnerability that lives in the hearts and minds of those children that have been abused emotionally and physically that are outlined in The ACE Test. I have written in the past about the significance of the Portland, OR based pediatric clinic who started giving the ACE Test to parents as they arrive at pre and post natal appointments. I asked for that in a letter to the editor here in Nashville, which in some ways is the nation’s capital of healthcare because of the large HCA and other major corporate presence for hospitals. The letter was not printed. I do believe I wrote about it here in the ACE Connection as well and asked for support to have that be MANDATORY.
My greatest concern is this. Do we have the resources to handle the TSUNAMI of sadness and anger that will for sure happen if we launch something like #MeTOO4Children? It is our deeper core problem that is certainly the elephant in the room…if you have ever been exposed to this subject in your lifetime. I know this for a fact from one very serious conversation with a doctor who worked in that field for most of his lifetime. He said that the sexual predator is almost always someone who has been abused. And that the average number of children abused by that predator typically was around 200 cases. TWO HUNDRED!
I have for the last decade of my life tried to pay forward the goodness our parents blessed us with on a daily basis. Yet, writing The ACEs Revolution! offers a minimal amount of science about ACEs and most of the book is about what a loving and respect filled home looks and feels like. That is what Dr. Felitti says is the most important thing we can do…more positive parenting. The sadness and anger of ACEs is a post trauma scorecard. Without the hope for resilience our efforts really don’t have as much value.
Most of our country has never heard of the ACE Connection or ACEs Too High. But now we have an opportunity to expose all the great work and effort that we see advancing the cause. Jamie Redford’s two movies Paper Tigers and Resilience need to be on prime time TV now that the media is circling this subject matter on a daily basis. Who among us has the ear of the right people to make that happen? Imagine the traction we could have if our community grew with the backing of some corporate sponsors like HCA or Johnson & Johnson. I was making inroads with J&J who deeply cares for their employees…until the record hurricanes changed the focus of some key employees that needed to find shelter, etc. for their employees.
I built a website named NoACEs.club for the same reason. It’s goal is to motivate students to find the courage to write their story in a very private moment and store it away until they find the ONE PERSON who cares enough to read it and extend a lifeline of caring to that individual. But again, do we have the resources to deal with the staggering amount of children affected by childhood trauma? If we could only get our government to focus on this subject as opposed to using our tax dollars to build walls. Imagine instead that we used that money in our schools for counseling help and at pediatric locations that might help parents get counseling before we perpetuate the circle of abuse that demeans our world today.
I am hoping to be part of something big starting here in Nashville, going beyond the efforts of our ACE Awareness organization. It is called The Indie Artist School Outreach Tour. As you may realize, school budgets are always being trimmed, not expanded. For that reason, sponsorship from corporations, endowments and other benefactors will support the outreach to students from K-12 and universities. Imagine reaching out face to face with music and stories that give children hope that they can find someone who cares. Saving hearts has been the focus of my life for some time now because I had it so good as a child. This type of face to face exposure is sure to do that. Because children are HUNGRY for that connection. And as you know, the norm is NOT a happy childhood. Vinny Ribas started this program and is in need of sponsors. Take a look and use your connections to help support something like this.
Lives are in the balance. Our community of ACEs Connection/ACEs Too High are moving forward every day to help those in need. Let’s work together now to use the #MeToo4Children to let the rest of the world know that we are here with hope for resilience as our national goal.
With Kindness & Hope,
John Trayser
The Greatful Dad!
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