By Perpetua Neo, Image: Clique Images/Stocksy, mbgmindfulness, November 25, 2023
“I need to work harder to make amends for my past,” my client hesitantly tells me. “What amends?” I say, “Someone hurt you badly, you don’t have to make amends for that."
She pauses. It’s a radical new idea to entertain—something that turns her world upside down like a snow globe that’s been shaken, sending iridescent confetti everywhere.
When people have a trauma history (be it a romantic relationship, a case of workplace bullying, or childhood abuse), they get stuck in certain patterns where they continue to hurt themselves. This opens up raw wounds that make it even harder to heal; As time passes and re-triggering piles up, it is a compound interest that works against you. You're exhausted mentally and physically the longer you carry a burden, and start feeling as though this is what you’re condemned to for life.
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