Hmm...Beautifully Un-Obtainable

For mothers of babies and toddlers, please remember La Leche League.  Mother to mother support for parenting and breastfeeding.  Free.  1800 LA LECHE

Parenting with ACEs is tough and if one is alone it is terrifying. Fortunately, I lived in a neighborhood that where there were women who were so supportive. Just simple acts of kindness went a long way in alleviating my alienation and shunning from my family.

The kindly grandmother who advised me what to give my son after the 6 months, who helped me when my son's father was dying in the hospital. Offered to take care of my son. Passed on her grandson's outgrown clothes, his tricycle, his walker. Collected money for me from her Satsang (religious singing) group when my partner died.

Or the other neighbor who insisted I join them for meals after being bereaved. Who helped me pack to move on to a job in another place. Who helped me again settle back closeby after that job panned out. Who took care of my son while I went job hunting. Who always welcomed in their home and helped out in any house maintenance.

None asked any questions or judged me. They just did what was needed to be done. Unlike the church, I went to, as soon as I shared with one of the women that I had been in a live-in relationship she immediately told the pastor and there was group counseling to save the sinner. No one asked about my story. 

Sad what Christianity has become today, mindless praying, deceit, judgment.

Nothing about really loving your neighbor. The people who helped me were Hindus. I really feel glad to live in India.

And mind you these are just 2 instances of help being extended.

Can a community go beyond the discussing, seminars and just actually be there for one another. Love one's neighbor.

And you are not just helping your neighbor. You are sure to go to heaven. Jesus said that in his parable 'The Good Samaritan'

Oops, that was exhaustive.

Hi Rebekah:

I hear you. It's so frustrating when you find exactly what you think might help, but can't afford it and what is affordable or accessible is not what helps.

The Facebook page for Parenting with PTSD has a community and there is free support, peer to peer, in that. And they may have scholarships available as well. I've not done the private stuff with Joyelle but she's a powerful writer/activist. I believe Beating Trauma has some similar options (about half the cost) as does Svava at Educate4Change.

I did a 3-hr. workshop once on Parenting with PTSD and kept it under $50. But that's still not accessible for everyone. And of course, people need to be paid for time, energy and expertise. AND we need affordable peer and survivor-mentor work. Won't it be nice if/when these are covered by insurance? Or more like an AA style that's not led, as an option?

For me, free-writing groups (free or close to) are the best place for honest, open, peer sharing that's creative. But, those aren't easy to find either.

I could see YOU offering something like this as part of an org, online, etc. We need it all and each other! PLEASE share everything and anything at Parenting with ACEs. Maybe we can create some free online stuff together for the community? 

Keep speaking up and sharing your writing, ideas, and resources.

Cis