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Undoing the Harm of Childhood Trauma and Adversity (www.ucsf.edu) + Commentary

Isn't that the most encouraging headline? Too few articles about ACEs offer any hope about what can help. For so long, researchers, writers and activists have been trying to make the point and "prove" that ACEs matter, ACEs matter and oh yeah, ACEs matter ! There have not been enough funding or focus on what can be done, individually and systemically, in general or as parents, in particular, to counter the impact of ACEs. “If you want to interrupt ACEs, you have to help the adults heal,” he...

Art Therapy: Treating Combat-Related PTSD (www.psychologytoday.com) & Commentary

This is small but interesting study and while it focuses on those with combat-related PTSD it has ideas which may be of interest to those of us here in the Parenting with ACEs group. Who hasn't felt that finger painting or crafting wasn't more than just creative or fun? Sometimes, it can feel and be healing in ways we can feel and know if not necessarily understand and articulate. Here's maybe some of why we should all keep coloring books on our kitchen tables with a basket of markers, paint...

Is Sexism an ACE?

Many of us have experienced sexual assault and/or abuse. The idea that our children could experience the same is terrifying to the point of being paralyzing. Even if our daughters have an ACE score of 0 they will not escape sexism. The upside of so much media coverage about sexual assault, harassment and sexism is that it gives us the opportunity to talk to our kids with a tiny bit of distance. What I mean, is that we can have conversations that are more topical and general, because we are...

E is for Empathy (www.npr.org)

Parents and teachers are worried. They believe that today's kids are growing up in an unkind world and that learning to be kind is even more important than getting good grades. But, when it comes to defining "kind," parents and teachers don't always agree. That's according to a new survey of some 2,000 parents and 500 teachers from the educational nonprofit behind Sesame Street , Sesame Workshop. Kindness is well-trod territory for Sesame. Here's actor Mark Ruffalo trying to teach a Muppet...

Is it a Parenting with ACEs Thing or Just a Parent Thing? Why Is It So Hard to Just Stop?

I have a friend going through a rough patch. She was physically sick with a back to back virus which is no fun for anyone but brutal for a single mother with young children. She got herself and the kids bundled up and out for a full fall day on Saturday and Sunday left her utterly depleted and unable to do much of anything. So she was now not only sick and exhausted but deflated and feeling guilty for not being a better mom, for her kids having a boring day, for not being more fun or active.

Parenting’s Troubled History

As we learned from the CDC-Kaiser Permanente ACE Study , negative childhood experiences are often kept secret, downplayed, or repressed because of our powerful desire to put such things behind us. Unfortunately, our minds and our brains don’t work that way. Patterns can play out automatically, no matter how hard we try to be original and create our own realities. Just as it is important to know family medical history (e.g., diabetes or tuberculosis) it is equally important to know about our...

Is Nothing Something? (lionsroar.com)

Thich Nhat Hanh answers children’s questions. Children have a special place in the Plum Village tradition of Buddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh. There are special practices, vows, and programs designed especially for children and teens, and Thich Nhat Hanh often fashions the first part of his dharma talks with them in mind. He regularly takes questions from children, and by and large adults can identify with what they ask. Children may be smaller and younger and they may have a funny way with...

Mama Obama & Daddy Donald: Growing Myself Up (www.healwritenow.com) & Question

Dear Parents & Professionals: How are you all responding to Michelle Obama's powerful speech? How are you holding up hearing all the women talking about we have experienced? In general as well as in relation to Donald Trump and Bill Clinton? I've been so deeply rattled and disturbed. But not, at first. It took me hearing Michelle Obama's speech to get honest and clear and to allow tears and outrage. And also to do some serious self-reflection. I had my fourteen year old listen to...

How to Turn a Bad Day Around [creativecommons.org]

Here is a simple infographic (a link that Samantha posted on the ACEsConnection home page) but I wanted to highlight it here in Parenting with ACEs group. It is great tool to keep handy when the day isn't going as we had liked. Some simple things to do to shift our perspective. http://www.dailyinfographic.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/how-to-turn-a-bad-day-around.png

Changing the Frame — How parents and investigators can focus on family strengths (risemagazine.org)

During a family crisis or investigation, it can be hard to believe you have strengths. Investigations, by their nature, make parents feel attacked and ashamed. But all parents have strengths, and being able to show investigators what’s positive about you and your family is incredibly important. Investigators need a full picture of families’ “ protective factors ,” because those factors have been shown to help keep children safe. Q: How can parents show their “ protective factors ” to an...

Some foster kids are turning to 'survival sex' to make ends meet (www.circa.com)

For so many, traumatic stress and adversity don't end when childhood officially ends. Kids who age out of foster care are so vulnerable. This article is horrifying as is the fact that there is even such as thing as survival sex. Here's an excerpt from this article written by Fernando Hurtado. 'It's a real, real dark life' "It's not a want. It's a need." — Justina, former foster child Sofia, 23, was introduced to survival sex in 2014, she told us outside of a coffee shop in Los Angeles' Echo...

Parenting with PTSD: Breaking the Cycle Without Falling Apart - Event

I'm thrilled to offer a workshop at Riverside Trauma Center in Massachusetts in Dec. I'll be speaking as a parent-writer-trauma survivor perspective about ACEs and parenting with post-traumatic stress. The talk, geared mostly to clinicians and social workers and I'm eager to talk about parenting with ACEs (this group and in general). More about Riverside Trauma Center and the workshop, below. Riverside Trauma Center . a service of Riverside Community Care, helps people in Massachusetts...

Response from Heather Turner to Question from Colette Ryan about Trauma-Informed Parenting Resources

Here's another private email I got last week that I'm eager to share to keep this dialogue going. Clearly, people are looking for more about trauma-informed parenting and interested in the question posed by Colette Ryan. These are Heather Turner's thoughts. She shared them via email and I asked if she'd allow them to be shared with the wider group. Luckily, she agreed. Please add your own thoughts, feelings and insights to this conversation. I was forwarded a copy of your email in which...

Sex Trafficking Prevention: A Trauma-Informed Approach for Parents and Professionals (Book Resource)

Just a quick post to share this book resource I heard about this morning from Beth Grady . The author is Savannah J. Sanders and here's a bit more about her and this book, from Amazon (where I've just ordered my own copy): Drawing from her own experience being trafficked plus her insights gained from years of advocacy and anti-trafficking work, the author speaks directly not only of the realities of trafficking that occur in our own communities but also the solutions that we can all be a...

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