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"When I'm with my Mom I miss my Dad. When I'm with my Dad I miss my Mom. I'm always missing someone." Katie, my cousin said those words when she was not yet in first grade. It was heartbreaking and sad. When my daughter's Dad and I divorced, my daughter wasn't as emotional, at first. When we told her that her Dad and I were separating, and assured her, "It's not your fault," she said words I'll never forget. "Why would it be my fault?" She thought that was ridiculous and silly. That was a...

Here's a link to the policy report put out earlier this year by the Annie E. Casey Foundation. Here's a summary of what's in it in case you want to explore it more. More than 5 million U.S. children have had a parent in jail or prison at some point in their lives. The incarceration of a parent can have as much impact on a child’s well-being as abuse or domestic violence. But while states spend heavily on corrections, few resources exist to support those left behind. A Shared Sentence offers...

On behalf of California Essentials for Childhood, I am very excited to announce the release of a new Child Adversity and Resilience data topic on Kidsdata.org! This has been a collaborative effort between the CA Essentials for Childhood Initiative's Shared Data and Outcomes Work Group and the Lucile Packard Foundation for Children’s Health. I represent ACEs Connection Network on Essentials and am the co-chair of the Shared Data & Outcomes Work Group so I couldn't be more thrilled about...

I loved this short tutorial about a quick somatic activity to release tension or "melt the grumpy" as the title says. "Melt the Grumpy" is a somatic activity to help shift your emotional state with physical movement, breathing and imagery. When you are feeling irritable, or just not happy, swing both of your arms at thigh level one side to the other across your midline. This motion helps break up postural patterns and muscular tension. Using the momentum of swinging your arms with trunk...

This article was published earlier this year but it's new to me. It was written by Maggie Fox. To me, it shows the need for trauma-informed peer parenting education for, with and by parents. Here's an excerpt: We found that 91 percent of parents had at least one adverse childhood experience, while 45 percent had four or more," Conn said in remarks prepared for her presentation. "And among their young children, 72 percent had already experienced at least one adverse childhood experience."...

It can be overwhelming for parents to manage all of the media options available to children and adolescents around the clock and sort out the pros and cons of screen time. While media use can help build kids’ social skills, it also can put them at risk of obesity, lost sleep, bullying, addiction and violence, according to new guidance from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP). To help families navigate the digital world, the AAP has developed a Family Media Plan. Parents and children can...

I watched this video three times this morning. It's stunning and beautiful and emotional. It honors pain. "I just felt like I"m invisible. Maybe I should give up." Unique It offers hope. "It's hard to speak of Miss Daniels. She saved my life. Unique. It touches those of us who watch but it does more than that. It teaches. "If you can get to that pain. Because a lot of these children. My goodness. They just have something to say. They are crying out. They are acting out as their way of saying...

I became a professional reader long before I was a writer when I was living in homeless shelters, subsidized housing, and welfare hotels with my mother in New York City. Most of the middle class and affluent black folks I would come to know in the future would wince and give me a look I couldn’t read when I would tell the story that I outline in my new memoir, The Beautiful Darkness: A Handbook for Orphans . All some intolerant, ignorant bigots need is to continue to hear about the...

This is a brief, informative and accessible hand-out. It doesn't talk about ACEs but it does talk about traumatic stress and helps educate adoptive and foster parents, in particular. However, I think it's useful as a general guide. Excerpt: In my dream world, there would be a resources such as this for those of us Parenting After ACEs and with traumatic stress symptoms. If you know of any, please share them. Many of us are needing to provide trauma-informed self-care and understanding while...

Hi everyone! So glad to have found you all. (I'm still learning my way around so apologies if I've posted this in a few places.) I'm Alison Morris, single adoptive mother to a child with early developmental trauma whose ACEs score is sadly quite high. Even more sad is that I think my own parenting may have added a check or two since I had no idea what was going on for quite a while, and even when I did I found it SO hard to parent in a trauma-informed (connection- and relationship-based)...

With teens today facing unprecedented levels of toxic stress, self-compassion is one way to nurture inner wisdom, promote self-kindness, and self-heal. Christopher Germer, author of the Mindful Path to Self-Compassion says my forthcoming book, Self-Compassion for Teens: 129 Activities & Practices to Cultivate Kindness is "just the ticket for parents, teachers, and counselors who know the burdens of modern teens and want to help." Tara Brach, author of True Refuge and Radical Acceptance...

I came across this resource today. Sadly, it doesn't talk about the large number of parents who have PTSD from ACEs, developmental and complex trauma instead of or as well as combat-related PTSD. But, it's nice to see the topic of parental PTSD and the way it can impact children being discussed. Here's an excerpt: Introduction Researchers have examined the impact of Veterans' PTSD symptoms on family relationships, and on children of Veterans in particular. Understanding how these symptoms...