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"My experience with violence is very brutal...I grew up with violence as if it were my sibling." - LC participant (youth) "We know we can't run the city- it's too complex- but our experience and our voices should count, especially because we're the most effected ." - LC participant (youth) "Our city's problems are shared by us all; we are all part of the problem AND the solution. Listening is a key component to healing." - LC Share Out partici pant (adult) Three years ago, RYSE Center in...

One of my favorite books Neurofeedback in the Treatment of Developmental Trauma. Few write about development trauma as beautifully as this author. Sebern Fisher describes how and developmental trauma has such deep and lasting impact on children and adults. And how neurofeedback helps. She's even tried it herself as well. I recommend her book just to better understand complex PTSD. But if you are interested in learning more about neurofeedback, in general, this article by Winston Ross is...

CHICAGO — The agitated mom had three kids in foster care and she wanted them back. But she didn’t understand how to parent. She’d never worked. She had a short fuse. She was slow and didn’t seem to learn from experience. Dr. Carl Bell studied the young woman. Flat cheeks. Thin upper lip. Folds at the corner of her eyes. It hit him like a thunderbolt: She had subtle features of fetal alcohol syndrome. Bell had seen thousands of patients like this over the past 40 years and been baffled by...

Rachel Yehuda was interviewed by Krista Tippett last year and that entire On Being show was fabulous and worth listening to. This part below talks about the way we might talk about depression with our children. DR. YEHUDA: Exactly, and I think if we know what's going on in our bodies, then it just takes a lot of the confusion and the panic away from it, especially if we have this idea that this is a step on the way to having an equilibration of some sort. MS. TIPPETT: Does what you're...

Rahil Briggs, a child psychologist, is walking the corridors of the Pediatrics department at the Montefiore Comprehensive Healthcare Center. We’re in the South Bronx, New York. It’s one of the poorest urban areas in the country. Crying babies don’t faze Briggs. She looks serene — like she’s just finished a yoga class. Briggs says babies’ brains are “sticky.” “Their brains are disproportionately receptive. So whatever we throw sticks. That’s why they can learn Spanish in six months when it...

*Note: I'm posting this to the Parenting with ACEs site because so many of us have daughters who face this and the responses, often, by authorities are so poor. While some of us may not want or need to be on social media in our personal or professional lives, many choose to be and/or need to be and should be able to exercise the right with safety. This is another cyber safety issue but not one addressed early or often enough. At minimum this can help better educate all of us so we can better...

In 1986, in a few of the poorest neighborhoods in Kingston, Jamaica, a team of researchers from the University of the West Indies embarked on an experiment that has done a great deal, over time, to change our thinking about how to help children succeed, especially those living in poverty. Its message: Help children by supporting and coaching their parents. The Jamaica experiment helps make the case that if we want to improve children’s opportunities for success, one of the most powerful...

I love this essay about adult love and childhood abandonment. Maybe we are parenting and helping our children through grief and loss due to death, divorce, desertion or abandonment. Maybe we've been there ourselves. Children often can't or won't verbalize what they are thinking or feeling at the time. Maybe we read it in their body language. Maybe we need to ask. And sometimes it's just wonderful to read about the real lives of complex people doing such as being brave in love. This part...

My parenting was not ideal yesterday. I'd slept three hours and had a condo deal fall through days before closing. My house will still sell so I don't know where we'll be living in a few weeks. This is high stress. I was distracted, on the phone over 50 times with real estate people, the bank, attorneys, friends, town hall and rental places. Not fun. I cried a little but mostly felt an overwhelmed shutdown, the kind that comes with terrible thoughts. Like when the realtor says, "This has...

Have you heard or said how entitled kids today are? Maybe you think they expect too much and aren't as strong, resilient, capable or whatever as you or other adults? Maybe you can't imagine how they live - having so much, insisting on so much and texting so much. Maybe you think they are terrible and we were better. Maybe you admire them and wish you could trade places. Maybe generalizations make you uncomfortable or you just aren't sure what you to think about the generational changes or...

Please read this post and see the hand out. It's short and informative and I'm printing it out to talk about with my own teen. It's just another way to open the conversation on this. Staying Safe While Staying Connected via Emerald Montgomery

It's not trauma-informed if it's not informed by trauma survivors. I say this as a trauma survivor but even more as someone who has worked at a shelter for homeless families at a time when my own father was homeless. I saw class differences cause clashes that went beyond clumsy and awkward moments. People were hurt and dis-empowered at times by the very staffers working hard, and for low pay, to help. I was in college, and with only that as a qualification, told, during my first interview,...