Tagged With "Upcoming Livestream on Father's Day"
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NBC’s Al Trautwig Apologizes for Rude Comments About Simone Biles’ Parents (www.theroot.com)
If you like gymnastics or have been watching the Olympics you probably already know that Simone Biles is an amazing athlete . Did you know she has ACEs as well? Biles lived in foster care, had an absent father and parents who reportedly struggled with addiction to drugs. I didn't know any of this unitl NBC commentator, Al Trautwig, refused to call her adoptive parents her parents, first on air and later via Twitter. This angered many people. Luckily, Biles' coach and the public responded...
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New fathers may undergo hormonal, neural and behavioural changes (horizon.scienceblog.com)
Fathers’ hormone levels and brain activity may change when they spend time with their children, helping them adapt to parenthood in a way that has been overlooked until now, according to Professor Marian Bakermans-Kranenburg, who studies children and family relations at Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam and was until recently at Leiden University in the Netherlands. She is conducting a series of studies with new fathers, to investigate the role that hormones can play in how they bond with their...
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New Resource - Pre-Father Care: Prenatal Care for Fathers
Hello! I am writing to share a wonderful new resource from the Vital Village Network’s friend and partner, Charles C. Daniels, Jr. Charles is the Founder and CEO of Fathers’ Uplift, which works to assist fathers in overcoming barriers (financial barriers, addiction barriers, oppressive barriers, emotional barriers and traumatic barriers) that prevent them from remaining engaged in their children’s lives. Charles’s book “Pre-Father Care: Prenatal Care for Fathers” is now available for...
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New Toolkit Issued to Help Providers Measure Trauma With ACES Survey [youthtoday.org]
A new toolkit is out that aims to help services providers give a survey about traumatic childhood experiences that are linked to negative effects on health and well-being. The toolkit, developed by The National Crittenton Foundation , offers recommendations about the Adverse Childhood Experiences survey, including how to talk to children and parents about the survey, track results and use the data for public education and policy advocacy. The toolkit also includes a sample protocol, case...
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“No Coincidence, No Story.” Lisa See Inspires (www.healwritenow.com)
(Cissy's note: This is a post my sister, Karyn White Doherty, wrote for my blog about an event she organized with her book club. I share it here because it's about loss, grief, and ACEs as well as about what heals - relationships, community, and sharing stories. If you have been dealing with extreme weather or life conditions the last few days, and find reading or writing to be a soothing and wonderful escape, I hope you enjoy this. My sister is the best!) How does an author bring about...
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Paid Paternity Leave = Good Policy = Good Business [www.eenaduindia.com]
Kudos to Johnson and Johnson in India! The company has rolled out an e ight-week paternity leave for new and adoptive fathers during the first year. This move is taken to strengthen the bond between the child and the father. For the last six years in the company, 26 weeks of maternity leave for new mothers was already in force. ...“We think that leaves which encourage employees to be with their families can benefit organisations. They can be excellent motivational factors, i ncrease...
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Parental Presence, by Daniel Siegel, (www.garrisoninstitute.org)
Excerpt: Parental presence comes from the experience of a father, or mother, making sense of his or her life so that issues from their own childhood experiences do not impair, in any prolonged or profound way, their ability to connect openly with a child. Making sense of your life as a parent means reflecting on the past so that you understand how your own childhood experiences shaped who you have become. What this means is that you’ve done some at times painful reflections to see clearly...
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Parenting: A Cultural Perspective from Dr. Darcia Narvaez and Others
My first foray into the world of social services led me to become involved with what I thought was an under-appreciated aspect of parenting: the role of a father and the problems caused by an absent father. I drew from my own experience growing up. My parents first separated when I was about four-and-a-half years old. There were four children in our family. The youngest was only about six months old when the separation happened. My parents reconciled long enough for a fifth child to be...
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Parenting, COVID and Teens: The Hassle
It all started for me about two weeks ago. Even though I heard about Coronavirus here and there, it was just a distant conversation happening on the background for me. Until one day, I got home from work, and my husband said we had to start stocking up for the crisis . "Crisis? Which crisis?", I asked. "The outbreak! It is serious. My company is preparing us to work from home for at least four weeks". "Get out of here," I thought. He is known for being anxious and controlling, so I scratched...
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Parenting Matters: Supporting Parents of Children Ages 0-8 (The National Academies Press 2016)
A study published by The National Academies of Sciences in 2016 resulting in 10 Recommendations to build support for parents... "Over the past several decades, researchers have identified parenting- related knowledge, attitudes, and practices that are associated with improved developmental outcomes for children and around which parenting- related programs, policies, and messaging initiatives can be designed. However, consensus is lacking on the elements of parenting that are most important...
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Parenting’s Troubled History
As we learned from the CDC-Kaiser Permanente ACE Study , negative childhood experiences are often kept secret, downplayed, or repressed because of our powerful desire to put such things behind us. Unfortunately, our minds and our brains don’t work that way. Patterns can play out automatically, no matter how hard we try to be original and create our own realities. Just as it is important to know family medical history (e.g., diabetes or tuberculosis) it is equally important to know about our...
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Parenting with ACEs Resources: Power Sharing & Sharing Powerfully
Sharing as a trauma survivor, parent (via adoption), writer, and advocate, I'm going to detail what I find crucial in any program or perspective geared towards those currently parenting with ACEs. Most important, is that any program be survivor and peer-led (or co-led). If that's the only change done, it's a good one. Who shares content, and how, is as important as the content being shared. So often, programs to parents are patronizing, punitive, and can come across as "edupuking" all over...
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Parents Engaging Parents Sessions Spark Community Involvement in Liberty City [TheChildrensTrust.org]
Trenika Raiford never imagined herself as a group facilitator, but motivated to help her Liberty City community she decided to step up. Raiford, a single mom with three children who has lived all her life in the neighborhood, got a dose of...
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Passive/Public Parenting Education
It seems to me that if we want to reduce adverse childhood experiences we must work to improve the quality of parenting in communities. Visit advancingparenting.org to learn about a small nonprofit organization pioneering passive/public parenting education. Our plan is to 1) employ increasingly impactful media to display the parenting tips (appealing school age spokespersons presenting them on conventional and electronic billboards and semi trailers), and 2) expand geographically until...
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Permission to be actual humans during a pandemic, please
I have a single mom friend who is caring for a baby, a 16-year old, and working full-time. Her name is Heidi. This is the same friend, with an ACE score of 10, written about here a few years ago. This is what she posted on Facebook (and gave me permission to share) the day after Governor Charlie Baker announced the schools in MA will be closed, at least, until early May: The numerous and immediate comments and responses went something like this: I sighed in relief when I read Heidi's post. I...
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Pioneering Research Study on Child-Parent Psychotherapy Incorporates ACEs
The Child Parent Project , a five-year, $3 million federally funded project in Philadelphia, is the first research study in the U.S. partnering with public health agencies and family courts to gauge the impact of child-parent psychotherapy (CPP)...
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Please stop saying parenting is hard for everyone & read Parenting with PTSD instead
Sometimes, we feel anxious, intrusive, or afraid when changing or bathing or own babies. Sometimes, we feel sick to our stomachs and worried while potty training, nurturing, or disciplining our toddlers. Sometimes, we feel shame-filled and ill-equipped when talking about puberty, body parts, or sexuality because of how and where we were compromised by caregivers as children as in our bodies, homes, and families. P arenting is brutally hard for some. If affection, attention and intimacy have...
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Power and Partnership: A Guide to Improving Frontline Practice with Parents in the Child Welfare System (www.risemagazine.org) & the Importance of Lived Expertise
(Cissy's note: My Friday morning free-write on stuff I've been thinking about a lot of late) At least once a week, if not once a day, people ask about how to have more "authentic engagement" from parents, survivors, and community members - especially who are or have been in crisis related to ACEs. And sometimes, people share how hard it is to get or keep folks on committees who do have lived experience and care about trauma-informed change. I get these questions pretty often. But these...
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Prevention: Bringing Baby Home Training for Faciliators
A friend of mine recently referred her grandchild and his pregnant wife to a Bringing Baby Home class, because she noticed that the wife had a horrible background of abuse and at times had difficulty functioning. What the grandmother noticed with this couple was a change in the family dynamics. the couple knows how to get along, the father is engaged in parenting, and the baby thriving. This is really starting at the root of the problem. 20 years ago, Drs. John and Julie Gottman worked with...
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A viral photo of a calm dad and a screaming toddler holds an important parenting lesson. (upworthy.com)
Actor Justin Baldoni recently shared a poignant photo with his own daughter and the big lesion he learned from his Dad about such moments. Baldoni, best known for his role on the show "Jane the Virgin," shared a photo his wife, Emily, took while the family was shopping at the local Whole Foods. In it, Baldoni, along with his father, stares down at his daughter, Maiya. She's crying and/or wailing on the floor. Who knows about what. Her body is twisted into classic tantrum pose. When Baldoni...
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About Module Three: Vaginal Birth
Like conception and implantation, birth requires an intention to be born, and preparation – the baby actually initiates labour, and must move into an optimal position if a relativity easy birth is to occur. The action of the actual birth stages is dynamic, and the baby is actively involved in that movement.
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ACE Member Discount 18th Annual Families and Fathers National Conference Limited
I am sharing a 20% discount and that U.S. OCSE as well as trauma experts are actively participating with a special series on March 1st at the 18th Annual Families & Fathers National Conference, "Never Giving Up - Breakthrough 2017", will be hosted by Fathers & Families Coalition of America from February 27 - March 3, 2017 in Los Angeles, CA. Early Bird Registration is now open with full event, two-day or one-day options for individuals to customize their training. The focus of this...
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ACE Testing During Pregnancy Is The Missing Link
Pregnancy is often welcomed with joy and hope however, many challenges and distress may still occur during a mother’s pregnancy. Any concerns simple or complex may impact the wellness of the mother, her baby and cause stress on her multiple relationships. Oftentimes, mothers have to face planned or unplanned life changing events.
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ACEs Science Champion Series: Dr. Angela Bymaster: This Faith-Based Physician Integrates ACEs Science with Healing Arts
Dr. Angela Bymaster, a family physician at Washington Elementary School in San Jose, CA, operates her clinic in a portable unit on the school property.
Because the unit faces students as they are dropped off by their families, she gets to “pick up the kids” before they are sent to the clinic, practicing “upstream medicine.”
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ACEs Science Champions Series: Eulanda Thorne Applies ACEs Science Awareness at School and at Home
Eulanda Thorne and her children (L to R) Sarah, Joshua, Leah, Emmanuel When school counselor Eulanda Thorne discovered the science of adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) in 2018, she felt as if she were on fire. “I felt that I had missed a vital part of my education. Anyone who is in college for social work or teaching, a class on ACEs and trauma should be a required course.” Without an understanding of ACEs, she says, “I would think the students who are sent to me are being defiant or...
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Adoptive Father Writes About Coping with His Own Secondary Trauma & Anger
I write about parenting as a high ACE scorer. But many here (in this group and in the wider network) have lower ACE scores than their children. This is an essay by a father with secondary trauma writing about anger and self-care as he parents, advocates, educates and manages day to day challenges. The full article in entitled, How Did I Become So Angry , written by Donald Craig Peterson. Here's an excerpt: Constantly fighting battles on the front line can consume anyone. And the symptoms of...
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Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs)…Why is Hugging Sooo Very Critical?
"The reality of my own “adverse childhood experiences” is just catching up with me at age 73. My guess is I’m not alone."
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Adverse childhood experiences in the news: Successes and opportunities in coverage of childhood trauma (www.bmsg.org)
Please find excerpts from a piece published in Issue 24 of the Berkeley Media Studies Group about where and how ACEs are covered in the news. It was published a few months ago but I missed it and am thankful it was shared with me last week. and Click here to read full-length version and for a downloadable pdf.
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Another from the Fathering as a Survivor Series (www.triggerpointsanthology)
If you know, love, live with, work with or want to better understand men who are survivors, and become fathers, t his entire series has been amazing. Here's an excerpt from the one with Jeff Glover who is part of the malesurvivor.org team and answered some questions. 7. What would you tell another survivor father who is expecting their first child? I would tell him to brace himself! The journey has been the most intense that anyone could imagine. But for all the pain and fear and yes face it...
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Anxious Attachments in Relationships
As an Asian male in his forties and a single dad to a teenage son, I've always felt it hasn't been easy to meet women that I can connect with. In addition, my track record of being in relationships has been far from stellar. As a childhood abuse survivor, I unknowingly took the pain I endured into my relationships. With zero self-awareness, I was insecure and needy, which resulted in a lot of angry outbursts and emotional abuse towards my partners.
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At the cellular level, a child’s loss of a father is associated with increased stress (www.princeton.edu) & Note
(Cissy's Note: Several men have joined the Parenting with ACEs Community recently as a result of our recent chat on Fathers & ACEs . If you are one of them, welcome to this community. Just a reminder that ALL MEMBERS OF COMMUNITY ARE ENCOURAGED TO SHARE HERE. Please share essays, articles, research, resources, questions, stories, and statistics. Add calendar events to the calendar. Get a discussion going in the discussion section. Leave comments for one another. If you have questions or...
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At UCLA, a dorm floor dedicated to first-generation students [latimes.com]
Cissy's note: Many of us Parenting with ACEs were first generation in college. Others have kids who will be the fist generation in college. Good to know what this experience can be like. Desiree Felix didn’t make her way to UCLA with the help of helicopter parents who hired tutors, hounded teachers or edited her application essays. Her father is a handyman with a sixth-grade education. Her mother finished high school and helps manage apartments. At Kennedy High School in Granada Hills, Felix...
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Be the Spark: Igniting trauma-informed change within our communities
Authors note: This piece is co-authored by @Lara Kain and @Christine Cissy White. Though we had never worked together or met, we were asked to co-present on creating t rauma-informed changes in communities by the Attachment Trauma Network for the first national (now annual) Creating Trauma-Sensitive Schools Summit in Washington, DC. This article is an expanded essay version of that presentation). Be the Spark Oprah Winfrey helped mainstream discussion about...
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Briefing in Support of ACEs Legislation - WATCH LIVE
Tomorrow (July 26), Building Community Resilience will co-host a briefing on childhood trauma-- The Need to Address Childhood Trauma: Implications for Child Welfare and Education-- at the U.S. House of Representatives. Honorary Co-Hosts are Rep. Danny K. Davis (IL-7) and the Congressional Foster Youth Caucus. Featured speakers include Wendy Ellis , Milken Scholar, doctoral candidate and BCR Project Director, Olga Price , Director of the National Center for Health and Health Care in Schools.
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Childhood Should Not Be Disrupted
People often ask me why I wrote # ChildhoodDisrupted . As a science journalist specializing in the intersection of neurobiology, immunology and emotion, I’d spent 20 years writing about the immune system and the human brain. When I came across the CDC’s # ACE Study (Adverse Childhood Experiences Study), it struck me like a lightning bolt. I realized that after 20 years of writing about how we become ill and how we heal, I had been missing a huge piece of what can cause disease. Chronic...
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Children of Incarcerated Parents and Academic Success [Blogs.NCTE.org]
This blog post is about the complex relationship between a parent’s incarceration and a child’s academic success. For me this relationship is personal and scholastic. I was in fifth grade when my father, a lawyer, received a two-to-five year prison sentence for larceny. Although my family was confronted with the same challenges other families face when a parent is incarcerated (i.e. housing and food insecurity, inadequate heath care, childcare challenges, etc.), we also had considerable...
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Divorce During Christmas
My home was flooded just weeks before my divorce was final. The ocean spilled over the sea wall and headed down the street carrying telephone poles, patio furniture and boat parts. It was 2 a.m. and I was in my bedroom with the cat as my daughter was with her father on one of her first overnights. I was knee deep in despair. And fear. The ocean pooled around my stairs, foundations and car. Outside, the flood would take my blue Subaru, dog fence and air conditioner. Inside, it was thr heating...
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Dozens of Kaiser Permanente pediatricians in Northern California screen three-year-olds for ACEs
Since August 2016, more than 300 three-year-olds who visited Kaiser Permanente’s pediatric clinics in Hayward and San Leandro have been screened for adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), such as living with a family member who is an alcoholic or losing a parent to separation or divorce. But when the idea to screen toddlers and their families for ACEs was first broached at the Kaiser Permanente Hayward Medical Center, the staff were, in a word, “angsty,” says Dr. Paul Espinas, who led the...
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Dr. Gabor Maté & Full-Potential Parenting, Even When It Is Hard
Note: Allison Morris had dozens of experts in her summit series through Full-Potential Parenting. I took notes only on those by Donna Jackson Nakazawa , Gabe Maté and Sebern Fisher (coming later this month). Though the audios are no longer available, for free, they can be purchased for $100. or less (depending on the year), here. Forgive me for sounding like an advertisement, I don't know Allison personally. I am a huge fan of all parent-led resources and wish I discovered this series...
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Early childhood educators learn new ways to spot trauma triggers, build resilience in preschoolers
A hug may be comforting to many children, but for a child who has experienced trauma it may not feel safe.
That’s an example used by Julie Kurtz, co-director of trauma informed practices in early childhood education at the WestEd Center for Child & Family Studies (CCFS), as she begins a trauma training session. Her audience, preschool teachers and staff of the San Francisco-based Wu Yee Children’s Services at San Francisco’s Women’s Building, listen attentively.
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Early Life Adversity for Parents Linked to Delayed Development of Their Children [prnewswire.com]
CINCINNATI , March 21, 2018 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ -- Researchers at Cincinnati Children's report in the journal Pediatrics a link between parents impacted by adverse childhood experiences and increased risk for delayed development of their children at age two. The retrospective study reviewed the data of 311 mother-child pairs and 122 father-child pairs treated at a large pediatric primary care practice (study collaborators The Children's Clinic, Portland, Ore. ) The children were born...
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Re: Parenting: A Cultural Perspective from Dr. Darcia Narvaez and Others
Hello! I am writing to share a wonderful new resource from the Vital Village Network’s friend and partner, Charles C. Daniels, Jr. Charles is the Founder and CEO of Fathers’ Uplift, which works to assist fathers in overcoming barriers (financial barriers, addiction barriers, oppressive barriers, emotional barriers and traumatic barriers) that prevent them from remaining engaged in their children’s lives. Charles’s book “Pre-Father Care: Prenatal Care for Fathers” is now available for...
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Re: Alice Miller's For Your Own Good: Hidden Cruelty in Child-Rearing and the Roots of Violence
Yes, and sadly it may have taken generations and lots of child psychology/parenting education classes to overcome this phenomenon! My great-grandfather immigrated from Germany and 3 generations later, in spite of advancing his education in child psychology, my father was very very strict and punitive. Not to the point of physical beating, but words and body language can do much to break down a child's self-esteem and ego. By the time I majored in early childhood education at CSU Sacramento,...