In my experience, effectiveness of any intervention requires a paradigm shift in the thinking of the provider. The shift is from a compliance model for which there are behavioral consequences to a model that considers safety vs threat. There is a parenting program I like called "Hand in Hand Parenting" and they use a "stay listening" technique that promotes relational safety. Most of us grew up in a compliance model of parenting. It takes a lot of reflection and practice to make the shift from our automatic response of needing compliance to an automatic response of promoting relationship. And I would say, having an Occupational Therapist who can give you ideas about how to promote regulation in the body is a must!