Hi Lee:
What's the goal for the night? Are you hoping parents will get curious about the ACE test and study? Are you hoping to help parents understand their own stress? For me, learning about ACEs was fun because it empowered the heck out of my parenting and helped (and still helps me) prioritize parenting and self-care.
I talk about the ACE test as the only one you want your kid to flunk. And even if we, as parents, ACEd the ACE test, we can help it so our kids do not. To me, that's giving my kid an ACE advantage I didn't have. , which is what those with no or low scores have compared with high scores.
For me, understanding the burden of high ACE scores gives me compassion for myself, as a parent, and motivation to make sure my kids has less ACEs, first, and more support even for the ACEs that weren't prevented. It means I know that even if I can't change the past I can change the future. For me, that is fun. And once I understand that, I'll even attempt to participate in the things I might have thought were soft, fluffy and nice if you had lots of time and money (mushy, gushy joy and sweetness). But before understanding ACEs, stress, toxic stress, I honestly felt too mired down and busy for fun. Winning a gift card might have got me to stop, for sure though. Or it was a gift card to a toy store and my kid wanted to stop and fill out the form, or whatever, that too would work.
For some, resilience talk is super exciting and empowering. For me, it didn't engage me because it seemed too trait specific like I was trying to make my kid or some different kind of person or personality. Which for me, didn't feel fun or even possible. But I know I can change circumstances and if she can have ANY advantage, and a lower ACE score is a BIG advantage, I want that for her.
I think you try languaging it a few different ways and see what works or what doesn't and keep at it. And please come back and tell us here how it went since others are doing similar things.
Cissy
Group Manager, Parenting with ACEs