Although ACES specifically refer to children, you cannot separate domestic violence from child abuse. A perpetrator who lacks empathy and feels entitled to hurt their partner or ex-partner will also hurt their children without remorse. At the National Alliance for Targeted Parents, we have found that the psychological (emotional) abusive strategies that a perpetrator/parent uses on their partner are the same strategies that they use on their children. Specifically, narcissistic/borderline partners/parents manipulate and exploit their family's emotional needs undermining their self-esteem and confidence. Duluth's post separation wheel is an accurate description of what happens when a domestically abused parent tries to leave a narcissistic/borderline abuser to protect the children. Children of a narcissistic/borderline parent have ACE scores of 7-8+. However, because parents and partners with these personality disorders have the ability to mimic or mirror appropriate emotional responses in public, they are never stopped.