Tagged With "Crappy Childhood Fairy"
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Next "A Better Normal" community discussion series: April 7, 2020 — Tian Dayton
Therapist and author Dr. Tian Dayton, who first started writing about ACEs science more than 20 years ago, will address grief and maintaining emotional sobriety during COVID-19. Carey Sipp, Southeast community facilitator for ACEs Connection, will host this community conversation, and Alison Cebula, Northeastern regional community facilitator, will moderate.
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Overcoming Past Trauma to Create a New Future [yogajournal.com]
Yoga teacher Tatiana Forero Puerta, author of Yoga for the Wounded Heart, shares what she’s learned about trauma, clearing emotional patterns, and finding a vision for the future. If at the age of 20 you would’ve asked me to imagine my life 15 years in the future, I wouldn’t have been able to give you an answer. I couldn’t see my life in those terms. When I looked into my future then, I simply saw a field of blackness; my potential was not just obfuscated—it was inaccessible. This is what...
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Parent Handouts updated and available In Dari, English & Spanish
The updated parent handouts are now available in Spanish as well as English and Dari. Here's the blog post with links to all three versions of each flyer. All versions of the Understanding ACEs and Parenting to Prevent & Heal ACEs parent handouts can be downloaded, distributed, and used freely. Both flyers were made with generous support from Family Hui, a Program of Lead for Tomorrow, who is responsible for making the Spanish and Dari translations available. These are updates of the...
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Paving the Way to Healing Complex Trauma [eurekalert.org]
By Dan Salmon, EurekAlert!, December 13, 2019 A major study led by researchers at La Trobe University in Australia has identified key themes that will be used to inform strategies to support Australian Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander parents in the first years of their children's lives. The Healing the Past by Nurturing the Future project aims to break the cycle of intergenerational and complex trauma experienced by Aboriginal and Torres Strait islander people, by co-designing...
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Peer Program Uses Writing as a Tool for Trauma Recovery
For the past several years, a small yet dedicated group of writers has gathered at Pathway’s Peer Support Program in Ashland, Ohio to explore ways to use writing for overcoming life’s challenges, healing from trauma and adversity and building social connections with others. Tapestry of Our Lives is the result of their hard work. The writings in this anthology are rooted in adverse life experiences and childhood trauma, such as physical, sexual or psychological abuse or severe neglect.
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Pip had high #ACEs
I just finished reading Great Expectations for the second time. I could relate to it much easier this reading as I used an ACEs lens to understand Pip's experiences and challenges. Dickens knew in 1860 the effects of Adverse Childhood Experiences. It seems strange to see humanity hasn't really evolved emotionally and socially that much in 160 years. Hopefully the ACEs movement will help propel our consciousness raising.
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Positivities of Persistence Series: Persistence & Positivity Defined
While some scholars may attribute persistence to a need for control, I like to take the stance with those who look at persistence as a will to not give up. More and more research is emerging on resilience and its positive impact in off-setting ACEs (adverse childhood experiences), even learned resilience skills in adulthood.
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Preparing and Advocating for Medical Care as a Trauma Survivor
With all the health care changes and challenges in today’s society, going to the doctor or dentist is difficult enough for the average person. With a history of childhood or adolescent sexual trauma, a medical appointment can become re-traumatizing if not handled with care by the survivor and provider. Think about it, some other adult is making decisions on the survivor’s behalf, touching their body, has their hands in the survivor’s mouth rendering them unable to make their needs known or...
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Resentment: A Trigger for CPTSD and Dysregulation
What’s the difference between anger and resentment in Childhood PTSD? Is it really so wrong to be resentful? Isn’t there a risk of becoming a forgiving “doormat” if you lose the resentment you carry against those who wronged you? In this video I explain the everyday toxicity of resentful thoughts, and how to use my Daily Practice to release resentment and fear, and gain more clarity, and more power to make choices in life. You can learn my techniques for releasing fear and resentment, and...
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RESILIENCE: The Secret of CPTSD Recovery (First in a Series)
When we talk about a history childhood trauma, we talk a lot about the problems — the damage, the limitation on our lives, the sadness. But in reality, a lot of us are thriving despite abuse and neglect in the past. The word for this is resilient. Overcoming the effects of Childhood PTSD is not easy, and it’s not a road I’d choose for anyone. But if that’s the hand life dealt you, it is still possible for you to blossom into a life of depth and love and purpose. Resilience is often mentioned...
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Resources 4 Resilience (www.r4r.support) & Commentary
We have the best community. And it feels like a community even more right now when things are scary, threatening, and uncertain. Yesterday, Jondi Whitis shared an amazing resource yesterday, by way of a comment, that's great for parents, survivors, providers, and families (all of us). I am making it a blog post in case others missed it or are overwhelmed, as I have been, by sifting through the information coming at us. The home page lets you easily find practices for calming. Here's one...
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Rethinking 'Resilience' and Grit: www.economichardship.org
This article was written by Alissa Quart and co-published by the Economic hardship Project and the Boston Globe . To read the rest of this essay by Alissa Quart, go here.
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Running on Empty: How to Manage Your Energy Levels After Trauma [goodtherapy.org]
Laura's Note: This article was published in 2012, but the topic and the information therein stands the test of time. All too often, compromised energy levels are a lingering impact of traumatic experiences, particularly ongoing or frequent traumatic events in childhood. Compromised energy means that you simply do not have enough energy to tackle certain tasks. In addition, traumatic experiences often prevent people from learning how to manage their energy levels. This encompasses everything...
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Self Soothing Strategies for Parents and Kids
Learn 4 simple tools for parents and kids to calm down together. About the presenter: Joyelle Brandt is a self care coach for moms. She specializes in working with mothers who are survivors of abuse, to help them develop a personalized self soothing toolkit for stress management. As a speaker, mothering coach, and multi-media creator, Joyelle works to dismantle the stigma that keeps childhood abuse survivors stuck in shame and self-hatred. She is the author of Princess Monsters from A to Z...
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Seven Benefits of Working with a Therapy Animal from a Handler's Perspective
Sometimes I feel selfish for walking away from our therapy dog sessions with my heart overflowing with joy, a smile radiating from my face AND heart. I love watching this dog turn a child’s tears into giggles. Sammie has a thing for kids. Her tail wags every time she sees one. Whether we are walking the halls at a school or the trails at a nature preserve. She wants to meet them all and offer a snuggle. As a result, her tail thumps in canine happiness, and I just can’t help but grin.
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Seven Strategies I Use To Reregulate As Anxiety Symptoms Surface
So, how does Teri Wellbrock bring herself back into a state of calm once the anticipatory anxiety has been triggered? Here is Teri's personal go-to list. Please keep in mind she created this plan on a trial and error basis. She loaded her coping skills toolbox with exercises, fidgets, courses, books, therapy suggestions, and techniques discovered through personal research. Following is her top seven strategies, however, please note that she has a much larger bag-o-tricks to pull from if needed.
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Shattered By The Darkness: Powerful book by a humble man on a mission to prevent what happened to him from happening to other children.
Gregory Williams, PhD, will help change the world by taking this book into medical schools and teaching physicians and nurses about the root cause of most adult illness: childhood trauma. I just read this book in one sitting, save one hot tea refill. I could not stop reading it. Even though there were some passages that evoked anxiety, I couldn’t stop reading it, as I so wanted to learn more about this remarkable man and how he earned a PhD, had a normal family life, and earned the respect...
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Sheltering in Place: ACEs-Informed Tips for Self-Care During a Pandemic
Millions of lives have been affected in unprecedented ways by the Coronavirus (COVID-19). We are all grappling with uncertainty—our daily routines interrupted, not knowing what is to come. For those of us who have Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs), these times can be particularly distressing. At the Center for Youth Wellness (CYW), we know that childhood trauma can have a significant impact on an individual’s health and well-being – both physiologically and psychologically. Since the...
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Sick and Stressed from CPTSD? Power Up Your SELF CARE (Resilience Series)
I’ve been talking about resilience in recent posts — the obstacles that hold back recovery, and the strengths we need to keep healing. Last week the topic was fear. In this post (and the video that goes with it) I want to go up a layer to the next strength, and that’s self-care . I used to think self-care was just hot baths and chocolate for people whose problems were so small that this would actually solve them. But 25 years of continuous healing and strength-building has taught me that,...
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Sick and Stressed from CPTSD? Power Up Your SELF CARE (Resilience Series)
I’ve been talking about resilience in recent posts — the obstacles that hold back recovery, and the strengths we need to keep healing. Last week the topic was fear. In this post (and the video that goes with it) I want to go up a layer to the next strength, and that’s self-care . I used to think self-care was just hot baths and chocolate for people whose problems were so small that this would actually solve them. But 25 years of continuous healing and strength-building has taught me that,...
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Six Signs Your Brain is Dysregulated (and Ten Steps to Get Re-Regulated Again)
Adults who experienced early trauma are prone to dysregulation of the brain and nervous system, especially in response to stress. Dysregulation, in turn, can trigger (or exacerbate) depression, anxiety, illness, addiction and emotional outbursts. So clearly, learning to re-regulate is the first step in healing the effects of Childhood PTSD. If you think you may be experiencing dysregulation, learn about common symptoms (as well as ten on-the-spot healing techniques) on this free download.
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Ten Tools for Trauma Survivors [http://somethingtosayafterabuse.blogspot.com]
A couple years ago, I hit a serious wall. I was emotionally and physically exhausted, but didn't understand why. Sure, I was a mom, wife, graduate student, and ran a business, but this exhaustion went much deeper than my chronic state of busyness and hypervigilance. Sure, I knew I had a rough childhood and had gone no contact with my parents ten years prior. I got on with my life. I made many positive and deliberate changes so I didn't repeat their patterns, but I hadn't fully unpacked just...
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The A-List with Alison Lebovitz, Episode 1105: Dr. Bruce Perry [pbs.org]
By Alison Lebovitz, Public Broadcasting System, November 22, 2019 Join Alison Lebovitz as she interviews Dr. Bruce Perry. Dr. Bruce D. Perry is an American psychiatrist, currently the Senior Fellow of the Child Trauma Academy in Houston, Texas and an Adjunct Professor of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at the Feinberg School of Medicine in Chicago, Illinois. A clinician and researcher in children's mental health and the neurosciences, from 1993-2001 he was the Thomas S. Trammell Research...
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Yoga Transformed Me After Childhood Abuse [yogajournal.com]
How yoga helped me heal from neglect and violence I grew up in poverty in a drug-addicted and violent family. Without necessities like proper food or shelter, and subjected to regular abuse, I ran away at the age of 13. Within two years, I was on the road with a 19-year-old man. Being so young, I was attracted to his antisocial, rebellious past rather than recognizing these behaviors as red flags. Eventually, we called my mother and she threatened him with jail time for statutory rape and...
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“You Turned Out Fine:” How People Marginalize the Effects of a Toxic Childhood [blogs.psychcentral.com]
Laura's Note: Though the author is addressing toxic mother-daughter relationships, much of what she writes here can apply more broadly to other types of relationships and traumas. If I had a twenty-dollar bill for every time someone tells me that my mother “must have done something right” because I “turned out fine,” I could probably retire tomorrow in luxury. This came up during an interview recently, as if where I went to college and graduate school and have accomplished in my professional...
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Re: Self-Compassion Is Your Perfect Present Guidance, Even In The Most Troubled And Turbulent Of Times.
This is beautiful. I do believe that the heart-sense is indeed the surest form of guidance we have, but for many of us who've experienced childhood trauma, trusting that heart-sense or even finding access to it can be nearly impossible. So many of us have closed our heart spaces out of a need to defend ourselves and survive horrible circumstances, or we've intellectualized everything, getting stuck in our heads (or both). Thanks for these tips on overcoming that, Bob.
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Re: How a Therapy Dog Impacts a Child's Life
How fulfilling it must be to come full circle by helping children who've experienced trauma as you yourself recover from the long-term effects of childhood and adult trauma. And what a beautiful way to involve your adorable Sammie. Thanks for your work and for sharing here, Teri.
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Re: How a Therapy Dog Impacts a Child's Life
Oh, Laura, my heart fills with joy every Tuesday as I watch Sammie work her therapy dog magic. I had worked in a mental health agency in the school systems helping children with trauma, bullying, etc., but found it was taking its toll on me emotionally. I eventually left that job out of a forced situation (God's grace at work) as I had to go to work for a company I owned that was suddenly flourishing. Now I find I am back working with children, but this time Sammie is the one engaging them...
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Re: What Survivors of Complex Trauma Want You to Know [marieclaire.com.au]
I like that she mentions dissociation. I have been going to therapy for over 30 years and really had no idea about dissociation. I though it was something you could put a verbal memory to or just spacing out for a bit..... but dissociation is so much more. I don't think that childhood trauma can be healed until the treatment people all come to understand a whole lot more about dissociation and about how much of the symptoms of complex PTSD are really not accessible to the conscious mind.
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Re: The Healing Place Podcast - Shenandoah Chefalo: Garbage Bag Suitcase
Ah, yes -- I have heard of Chefalo's memoir Garbage Bag Suitcase. I love hearing about people who've sublimated their experience with childhood trauma into work that helps others. Looking forward to listening!
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Re: CPTSD and Procrastination: Healing the Feeling of Paralysis (Resilience Series)
Anna, I think my favorite thing about your articles/videos is that as a childhood trauma survivor, they usually make me feel so SEEN (in a good way) and understood. Validated, even. Anyone else? As for procrastinating, I wonder about the role of not being in touch with who you are and what you want or need might play here. The part of us that provides the feedback that tells us who we are and what we need is often shut down or at least somewhat fogged by what we experienced. Thanks, as...
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Re: The Healing Place Podcast - Shenandoah Chefalo: Garbage Bag Suitcase
Sorry for the delay in responding . . . I was enjoying a 9 day break at the beach on the Carolina coast! I, too, find it inspirational and heartwarming to know so many are using their triumph over trauma to guide others. A beautiful testament to becoming empowered. Thanks for listening in to the show and offering feedback. Makes my heart smile! Peace, Teri
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Re: CPTSD Confusion: How to Get Clarity in All Your Relationships (Resilience Series)
Yep. When growing up the adults around you are all "hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil" or you just don't know your experience isn't healthy because it's the only one you know, that inability to gauge just what's going on and what it all means can dog one for life. Thanks for another insightful post, Anna.
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Re: Trauma tried to kick down the door. Compassion is helping me heal.
Carey, this is a phenomenal piece. It's so raw and so true. We see how the woman pounding on your door and her actions trigger you, and how you find ways to work through the fight-or-flight response and the terror, and how you connect your reaction to that incident with your childhood experiences. And then you find compassion for yourself AND the woman who terrorized you. Not to mention your parents. And I don't know about you, but I'm reeling at the parallels between the woman at your door...
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Re: Positivities of Persistence Series: Persistence & Positivity Defined
Hmmmm. I don't think my husband has ever called me persistent, but he HAS called me tenacious more than once. Because I am. And I think there's a lot of overlap between persistence and tenacity. I never thought about whether my tenacity is a result of childhood trauma, but it's not a stretch to suggest that it might be, as you posit about your persistence. In fact, I'd say BOTH traits are forms of resilience, because in order to be either persistent or tenacious, you have to keep pushing,...
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Re: Positivities of Persistence Series: Persistence & Positivity Defined
Great feedback! And, yes, I have been gifted the tenacious label, too. Another one I've been told is that I am determined. Holds the hand of persistent. So glad you found your tenacity to muscle through those first 20 years. And this success meme is perfect. And oh so true! Peace, Teri
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Re: Free Webinars Teach You to Calm Brain Dysregulation From Childhood PTSD
Thanks for letting us know, Anna!
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Re: When You Need to Slow Down But It’s Hard [blogs.psychcentral.com]
Oh, yes to all of this. And productivity -- or rather chronic busyness -- can be especially seductive to adults with a history of childhood trauma. It can be a great distraction from uncomfortable emotions, memories, or thoughts. Plus, when you have a history of being made to feel helpless as a dependent child, the lure of feeling as if you actually have choices and can get something accomplished can be hard to resist. Good article -- the questions to ask oneself are very helpful. Thanks for...
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Re: Put down the self-help books. Resilience is not a DIY endeavour (theglobeandmail.com)
Cheryl, I'm so happy to hear that your son is giving you the support you've needed for so long. I also believe that childhood trauma is the cause of most if not all mental illness -- and that's ANOTHER idea that is getting a lot of press lately. It seems the tide is turning favorably. Let us brace ourselves for the inevitable backlash .
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Re: To Heal CPTSD, Do You Need to Love Yourself?
I never thought of it this way before, but your take on the whole self-love thing is profound, and clearly comes from a place of experience. I really like what you have to say about how these steps will lead you back to knowing whom to trust, because that knowledge has been there all the while, since the get-go -- it just got knocked offline by childhood trauma. And if it got knocked offline, it can be returned to its original, true state. Thanks, as always, Anna, for posting here.
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Re: Defining Resilience Series: Step 6 - Find a Guiding Hand to Hold
Great post, Teri! Every one of these steps is about connecting -- if not in person, then with information and resources that will help us along as we develop resilience. Then, of course, there are the ACTUAL connections, with therapists, with life coaches, and with friends and likeminded folks. I especially like the life coach suggestion -- I think one common long-term effect of childhood trauma is just getting thrown off track, right from the get-go, whether in our educational pursuits,...
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Re: Tell Me Who You Trust the Most
I think many people who've experienced childhood trauma would recognize this piece as a heartbreakingly accurate depiction of how trauma's effects play out in a child's daily life. I believe this could also serve to help those who haven't experienced it, and even those who may be skeptical of the depth of childhood trauma's impact, to understand. Thank you, Carol.
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Re: Defining Resilience Series: Step 6 - Find a Guiding Hand to Hold
I love it . . . I am right there with you, needing to find ALL the answers! I never really knew much about the concept of coaching until I started interviewing ACEs champions and found so many beautiful souls offering their coaching services to others. Like you said, "working with a life coach to get back on track can be a solid way to reclaim one's life." Agreed! Thanks for the feedback. Peace, Teri
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Re: Preparing and Advocating for Medical Care as a Trauma Survivor
Lara... This is great article and thorough in addressing the issues sexual abuse survivors face with their medical needs. I'm a psychotherapist with an expertise in childhood sexual abuse and have seen first-hand the anxieties survivors face anticipating medical appointments. I've helped survivors with this by teaching relaxation and visualization techniques to use during exams. You're right that their trauma-based fears and anxiety keep many from getting the preventive care and other...
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Re: Ancestral Trauma Meets Yoga in a Hospital Setting
I think the last paragraph is my favorite part of this piece. Sitting with discomfort -- whether it be over an experience like the one you describe at the hospital, memories and long-term effects of childhood trauma, or more common, everyday difficulties -- is really the most effective way to grow and move beyond that discomfort. Yoga is certainly one of the better tools we have for helping ourselves and others with that. Thank you, Kriaten, for sharing this here.
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Re: Why It Pays to Fully Heal from Childhood Trauma [pro.psychcentral.com/exhausted-woman]
I like it because for those who may be skeptical about how childhood trauma has impacted them (downplaying one's experiences is so common among ACEs survivors) or how therapy might improve their entire lives, this demonstrates (accurately, I might add), how childhood trauma and/or PTSD affects one's daily, mundane experiences, around the clock -- not only the big, overarching stuff like relationships and careers, but also simply going to the grocery store or navigating rush-hour traffic. It...
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Re: Do You Need Spirituality to Recover from CPTSD?
Hi Anna, I'm a holistic psychotherapist with a specialization in childhood trauma. I do believe that one's connection with a Higher Power—in whatever form that takes—makes a profound difference in healing. Thank you for your post and video. Warmly, Diane
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Re: The Importance of Connecting with Your Inner Child
Very encouraging post. I'm not sure anyone who's experienced childhood trauma can recover from its effects without connecting with their inner child, and I suspect that getting to know one's inner child is helpful even for those with no history of childhood trauma. Our childhood experiences -- good, bad, indifferent, and everything in between -- really do lay the foundation for all else to come. I think too that when we connect with our inner child, it's easier for us to cultivate...
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Re: The Importance of Connecting with Your Inner Child
Thank you for sharing! I connected to much of what you wrote. Particularly in the first paragraph when you wrote about childhood memories as being "home videos". Oh so true. But, through EMDR therapy I was finally able to see my life and past through my own eyes in lieu of the dissociated state of watching something horrible happen to a little girl (me) as if I was watching a movie. I wish you (and your inner child) continued growth, healing, empowerment, and peace. Teri