Tagged With "Crappy Childhood Fairy"
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8 Important Tools for Healing Trauma [thriveglobal.com]
Learning to understand your body and your inner emotional is the most valuable education you can receive. Healing is not about erasing what happened in the past, it is about finding the places the hurt got stuck, and loving that part of yourself so much it becomes free. I share with you today from what has worked for me personally in healing my own childhood trauma. Experiencing overwhelming events most often will later manifest at some point as ‘disease’, as we are often unable to cope in...
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8 Reasons Why People Deny Childhood Trauma and Its Results [blog.selfarcheology.com]
Why do people think they had a good, normal childhood, or deny childhood trauma and its results altogether? I often hear people say things like: My childhood was normal. Yes, there were some good things and some bad things – but that's life. My mother got sad, distant, or angry when I didn't perform well or acted badly, and my father sometimes hit me with a belt – but it was for my own good. All of this helped me to become a better person – and I'm thankful for it. Yes, sometimes I feel...
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A Brief Guide to Self-Harm and Unhealed Childhood Trauma [blogs.psychcentral.com]
Self-harm is a commonly misunderstood psychological phenomenon. Some people believe that those who harm themselves are simply stupid because why else a person would do that. Others think that self-harm is only attention-seeking behavior. Some even call it selfish. What is self-harm? Before digging deeper, let’s first define what constitutes self-harm. Self-harmful behavior is a behavioral pattern that results in harm to yourself. A very simple example of that is cutting. Another, more common...
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Apply now to Showcase your work at the San Francisco National ACEs Conference in October 2018!
Applications due June 18. Application link included in this post
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Are You Re-Traumatizing Yourself? 16 Things We Do That Can Set Us Back with Childhood PTSD
Part of the damage from abuse and neglect in childhood is what actually happened when we were kids. But a significant part of the problem today comes from what I call "Inside Traumas." These are self-defeating behaviors that are common to people who are frequently in a state of dysregulation. They start as an innocent attempt to feel calm and stable, but they can grow into significant traumas that cause real problems for us and others. If you'd like to learn about my online course, Healing...
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Cancer as a survivor
Many people use the phrase CPTSD to stand for PTSD from complex trauma. To me, C-PTSD means cancer and PTSD. I have cancer and I’m a trauma survivor. I’m a survivor with cancer but not yet a cancer survivor. Will I be a survivor squared?
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Care for Yourself, So You Can Care for Others
December can be a busy and stressful time for everyone. Please see the message below from the Office of Head Start, reminding you to take care of yourself and giving some helpful daily tips- Safe Foundations, Healthy Futures Campaign Care for Yourself, So You Can Care for Others December 2018 December can be a particularly hard time to take care of yourself. You may be busy, over-scheduled, stressed about finances, or worried about family. This month, the Safe Foundations, Healthy Futures...
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Childhood PTSD and Avoidance: Learning to Be OK in Groups (Resilience Series)
It’s super common for those of us who grew up with abuse and neglect when we were small, to feel as adults that we are on the outside somehow. When we're in groups we feel as if we are only partly in it, and never really included . Or we start as a full participant but pull away over time. We un-include ourselves. But it feel like other people are keeping us out. The telltale sign that being on the outside could be a personal choice, even when it doesn’t feel like it, is that we’re almost...
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CPTSD and Procrastination: Healing the Feeling of Paralysis (Resilience Series)
Have you ever had the experience where you know you should do something -- like go to work on time, or get ready for an important meeting, or just brush your teeth before bed -- but you just couldn't do it? Everybody procrastinates sometimes, but for people who experienced abuse and neglect in childhood, procrastinating can morph into a kind of paralysis. I’ve had this happen; I’ve spent whole seasons in this place before. And it's so demoralizing when it’s happening to know that you’re here...
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CPTSD and Social Awkwardness: Another Source of Isolation
For those of us who grew up with abuse and neglect at home, it can be hard to know how to ACT in social situations. Here's an example.... Have you ever been to a hotel where there is a person who is there to carry your bags, and even though you didn’t ask, they carry your bags to the room and it’s totally awkward, and you think “I’m supposed to give them a tip, right? I’ve, like seen this on TV. But you don’t have cash, and they’re just standing there ," and you think, "What do I do? What do...
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CPTSD Confusion: How to Get Clarity in All Your Relationships (Resilience Series)
One of the the most common, painful adult manifestations of Childhood PTSD is difficulty perceiving reality accurately, especially around the meaning of interactions we have with other people. We have trouble sometimes predicting that a choice is risky, or that a person we meet is unreliable, or whether our own sense of discomfort is an appropriate response. This is the sixth article and video in my resilience series, focusing on eight obstacles to healing from childhood trauma, and the...
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CPTSD: How to Transform Fear, and Develop INNER STRENGTH
Now that the pandemic has us all in a crisis situation, we’re about to find out to find out who falls apart in a crisis, and who rises up to serve, lead and encourage others. The ones who shine are not always who we expected — have you noticed this? Here in California we’ve been sheltering in place for over two weeks now. Everywhere in the world, we’re trying to figure out how best to respond to the pandemic, how best to care for ourselves and the people we love. It’s a work in progress. For...
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Depression & Moving Past Your Past [hopetocope.com]
When your present life feels limited by things that happened in your childhood, it’s time to find the tools and techniques to help you thrive. For better or worse, things that happen to us in childhood can shape our reactions as adults—in ways we’re not always aware of. When Katie ended up unemployed last year, she got mired in beliefs she’d absorbed as a girl linking solvency to self-worth. “To be foolish with money, in my father’s eyes, was one of the greatest sins,” she says. “To not be...
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Developing Super Powers: Using Resilience Strategies to Cope with Negative Experiences. Introducing CRI's Newest Book!
“I believe that everyone, especially a child, deserves to know how their brains are shaped by environment, to then understand their capacity for building proactive protective factors. We all deserve to be super heroes as we do the best we can to consciously live life well. ” - Teri Barila The superheroes we learn about in comics, movies, and TV shows swoop in to save the world with their incredible powers, to shield people from harm. But in our world, no matter how much we wish to protect...
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Do You Need Spirituality to Recover from CPTSD?
During a break in taping my new course on dating and relationships, I recorded this story about how hard it can be to change the self-defeating patterns that so often flow from Childhood PTSD. I talk about one summer when I was working hard to get through a dark time, and then a miracle took me by surprise. You can learn the writing/meditation techniques I mention as a source of daily healing, here . You can access my articles, courses and resources for people with Childhood PTSD on my blog,...
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Dr. Felitti Describes Future of ACE on TV Show with Dr. Alman
Scared? Since childhood, S. T. has been anxious & scared of dying. He learned helplessness from his mother. He learned self-punishment from his father. From the outside, he lived a successful life; good job, married & kids. Inside he was divided between constant self-doubt & an ongoing secret life of escaping into porn. He spent decades like this. One day he decided to get help. He started by talking to someone he trusted at church. He got referred to me. Not surprisingly, it can...
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Dysregulation & CPTSD -- Triggered by Hurrying and Overwhelm?
Note: This article is a transcript of a video excerpted from my online course Dysregulation Bootcamp. Brain and emotional dysregulation are common in adults who experienced abuse and neglect in childhoodhood, and is linked to problems with mood, mental focus, health and relationships. Hurrying is a huge trigger for a lot of people with Childhood PTSD -- everything from trying to get out the door in the morning, to rushing through traffic, to just getting overwhelmed with everything you’re...
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Erasing My ACES
Why I hid ACES from my medical records in order to receive equal treatment.
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Finding My Way Back
Have you ever felt you have painted yourself into a corner? Better stated perhaps, find yourself standing in the crosshairs of your own truth. Well, that’s me and here we are. In the last year, I have been going through a rebranding process, still the same heart, still the same mission, but a tweak to messaging and language so it was clear what the work was ultimately about. Simultaneously, I have been stewarding the completion of my book, my own story. Now, here I sit ready to pull the...
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First Book on Culturally Responsive Self Care for Early Childhood Educators
https://www.optimalbrainintegration.com/books
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Free Webinars Teach You to Calm Brain Dysregulation From Childhood PTSD
I've just scheduled five free Zoom webinars in the next four weeks, open to you and others interested in learning and trying my "Daily Practice." These are the techniques I've used for more than 25 years to re-regulate my brain and emotions, supporting the healing of Childhood PTSD. There are two particular and simple techniques we'll cover in each 55-minute webinar: 1. Writing fears and resentments 2. 20-minute simple meditation Plus time for Q&A with me Get more info and register here.
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From Compassion Fatigue to Healing Centered Engagement: Turning Trauma Informed Values into Action
To pave the way for a truly strengths-based approach to full healing and recovery for both service users and burned out staff, we must educate them on (1) the central role of primal body responses to trauma (past and present), and (2) the early development of adaptive thoughts and behaviors in response to
traumatic experience.
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Fuzzy Slippers: How Do Self-Care as a Trauma Survivor
When I recommend the need for self-care to trauma survivors, they say it can feel like a chore. Some of them even roll their eyes and tell me, “You mean you want me to take care of myself? Ugh. Who has time for that?!” It’s tempting for any person to undervalue self-care. But for trauma survivors, resistance to self-care has much deeper roots. Healing takes a focused, gentle approach. Self-Care as a Practice of Welcoming Your Needs Many trauma survivors learned to do without self-care...
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Greener Childhood Associated With Happier Adulthood [npr.org]
The experience of natural spaces, brimming with greenish light, the smells of soil and the quiet fluttering of leaves in the breeze can calm our frenetic modern lives. It's as though our very cells can exhale when surrounded by nature, relaxing our bodies and minds. Some people seek to maximize the purported therapeutic effects of contact with the unbuilt environment by embarking on sessions of forest bathing , slowing down and becoming mindfully immersed in nature. But in a rapidly...
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Healing from Codependency and the Freedom that Awaits
There is no healing without recognition of that which needs to be healed. Someone who has clogged arteries cannot heal those clogged arteries if they are unaware they have clogged arteries. To heal mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically, or cognitively first requires an acknowledgment of some kind of deficit or wound. In order to acknowledge a wound one must become conscious or self-aware of such wound.
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How a Men's Group Helps Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse
By Bert Pepper MD., March 18, 2020, Psychology Today How a men's group helped survivors deal with secrets of the past. When I was a young psychiatrist, I worked with Vietnam veterans traumatized by what happened to them, what they had seen, and what they had done. As I treated these veterans and studied PTSD , I realized that what I was learning could apply to help women. The first rape crisis units and shelters for battered women opened in the 1970s, at which time we also began learning...
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How Adverse Childhood Experiences Affect You as an Adult [psychologytoday.com]
What are adverse childhood experiences and how do they impact us later in life? In California, where I live and work as a sex and intimacy disorders specialist, there is a movement for mandatory adverse childhood experiences (ACES) assessment in all public and private medical and psychotherapeutic settings. So, regardless of an adult patient’s presenting issue(s) – medical, psychological, or both – clinicians would screen for childhood trauma. The reason for this push, which I strongly...
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How Adverse Childhood Experiences Affect You as an Adult [psychologytoday.com]
What are adverse childhood experiences and how do they impact us later in life? In California, where I live and work as a sex and intimacy disorders specialist, there is a movement for mandatory adverse childhood experiences (ACES) assessment in all public and private medical and psychotherapeutic settings. So, regardless of an adult patient’s presenting issue(s) – medical, psychological, or both – clinicians would screen for childhood trauma. The reason for this push, which I strongly...
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How Are You Feeling? Take a Minute to HALT for Your Health [goodtherapy.org]
Laura's Note: A common outcome of childhood trauma is disconnection with one's emotions and feelings and a tendency to minimize those emotions and feelings one does recognize. This article describes a simple way to recognize several types of feelings that demand our attention and care. How do you feel right now? Great? Okay? Not so good? If you aren’t feeling your best, taking a moment to HALT is one of the best things you can do for your overall mental and physical health. “Halt” translates...
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How Making Music Can Help Students Cope with Trauma [KQED News]
By Juli Fraga, MindShift Podcast, KQED News, July 15, 2019 Studies about the Ten Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) have shown that most people have experienced one of these traumas in childhood, such as being abused, having a parent who is incarcerated, experiencing homelessness, among others. The trauma one experiences in childhood can affect adult mental and physical health in later years, especially if a person has multiple ACEs. While the harm can have lasting impacts, health...
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How shallow breathing affects your whole body [headspace.com]
Laura's note: Many factors can contribute to a tendency to breathe shallowly, including childhood trauma. When your central nervous system has been stuck on constant alert for years--maybe even a lifetime--holding oneself in a way that restricts complete inhalations and exhalations comes with the territory. Many of us have a very hard time relaxing and letting go in a way that allows our breath to occur the way it is designed to for optimal health. And if on top of it you aren't aware of the...
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How Therapy Helps You Recover from Childhood Trauma and Abuse [talkspace.com]
If you experienced trauma or abuse during childhood, you might wonder if you should seek therapy . But maybe you are too busy to commute to appointments. You don’t even have any time to feel everything, much less talk about it. Then there are the plethora of worries people sometimes have when they consider working with a therapist. You might think, “What if I end up feeling worse? What if the therapist thinks I don’t have any problems? Am I exaggerating my experiences?” Then you start...
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How to Deal With Childhood Trauma and Build More Meaningful Adult Relationships [scmp.com]
By Luisa Tam, South China Morning Post, October 27, 2019 Unresolved childhood issues that often lie dormant for years can suddenly come flooding back. Not only can this be painful for the individual, but it can hurt our relationships with other people, especially romantic ones. They say a difficult childhood can have many lifelong negative effects, such as the inability to form meaningful and long-lasting relationships, build trust, or intimacy with another person. We all desire love and...
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How to Soothe Our Inner Wounded Child
Hi ACEs Connection Community, I am a staff member here at ACEs Connection. I have been hosting mental health tools for personal wellness each evening for the past 2 weeks since we've had to start sheltering in place and isolating. Note: These videos are a personal project and not done on behalf of ACEs Connection. The ideas are not officially endorsed by ACEs Connection, although I reference ACEs science. In this video, I talk about why childhood wounds may be triggered during this...
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How Trauma Therapy Cultivated My Recovery
I was 5 years old when I had my first encounter with trauma. Too young to comprehend the magnitude of the situation, my first grade class participated in a “Good Touch/Bad Touch” workshop,centered around educating and recognizing signs of sexual abuse. I found relief in finding a safe place to lay down the burden I had been carrying. I went straight to the school counselor and told her, in vivid description, the intimate details of my unwarranted molestation. I remember the grueling...
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“I Like to Move It, Move It!” – How Dance and Rhythm Can Reduce the Impact of ACEs (stresshealth.org)
As it is, more and more researchers studying the healing power of rhythmic movement on people who’ve experienced trauma from Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs), such as abuse, neglect, or parental mental illness or substance abuse issues. Among these researchers is Dr. Bruce Perry, a psychiatrist and senior fellow at the Child Trauma Academy in Houston who advocates dance, drumming, walking and other rhythm-based movements to help kids with trauma. In a book about trauma and the power of...
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I Now Suspect the Vagus Nerve Is the Key to Well-being [thecut.com]
Laura's Note: I have no research citation to back this up, but I have a hunch that childhood trauma may do a number on the vagus nerve, at least in some of us. Isn't it reassuring to know that we can help stimulate our vagus nerves through simple, free or inexpensive methods such as deep breathing and yoga (both of which get a lot of good press in this community, and for good reason)? It's no panacea, but it's not nothing. Have you ever read something a million times only to one day, for no...
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Inside the ACE Score Strengths Limitations and Misapplications with Dr. Robert Anda (www.YouTube.com) & Note
Cissy's note: Thanks to @Elizabeth Perry for flagging me and letting me know about this important YouTube video posted on April 6th via the ACE Interface Laura Porter channel which furthers this important discussion about the uses/misuses of ACEs scores. This topic is written about from a personal perspective by @Sirena Wheeler here, yesterday, on ACEs Connection a piece entitled Erasing My ACEs which @Laura Porter commented upon. I have found tremendous benefit from learning about ACEs...
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Inside the Adverse Childhood Experience Score: Strengths, Limitations, and Misapplications [ajpmonline.org]
By Robert F. Anda, Laura E. Porter, David W. Brown, et al., American Journal of Preventive Medicine, March 25, 2020 INTRODUCTION Despite its usefulness in research and surveillance studies, the Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE) score is a relatively crude measure of cumulative childhood stress exposure that can vary widely from person to person. Unlike recognized public health screening measures, such as blood pressure or lipid levels that use measurement reference standards and cut points...
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It Makes Sense
I felt inadequate and ill-prepared to speak to licensed mental health professionals about ACEs. But when I was asked to attend the 40th Annual Training Institute on Behavioral Health & Addictive Disorders in Clearwater, Florida to represent ACEs Connection, I was honored and eager. My background is in health planning, not mental or behavioral health. I review health data and look for gaps and inequities. My time is spent looking for and addressing the health needs of a community. So,...
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Keeping Childhood Trauma A Secret? That Can Lead To Psychological Problems [sandracohenphd.com]
You’ve kept your childhood trauma a secret out of shame and fear. There was no one safe to tell. Now, you don’t know who you can trust. If you open up, you’re afraid of being judged or punished. It’s a lonely way to live. Childhood trauma is devastating, no matter what form it takes. It affects your self-esteem, trust, future relationships, and sense of safety in the world. And, no matter what you do to forget, the secrets haunt you every day. You know some of the reasons you’ve kept...
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Kids From Trauma NEED Someone to Tell Them Their Normal Isn’t “Normal” [blogs.psychcentral.com]
Laura's note: As the first paragraph of the following blog post excerpt implies, a lot of adults need someone to tell them their "normal" isn't "normal" too. If it's all you've ever known and you're surrounded by friends and family who've had similarly unhealthy early experiences, how would you know otherwise? It took me a quarter of a century (literally) to realize that I experienced trauma throughout certain points in my childhood. It took me another year to realize that my behaviors were...
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3 Healing Practices to Connect with Yourself and Release Your Pain [tinybuddha.com]
“Our practice rather than being about killing the ego is about simply discovering our true nature.” ~Sharon Salzberg One of the symptoms of living in today’s fast-paced world is the underlying feeling of loneliness, overwhelm, and disconnection. Chronically stressed and under financial and familial pressures, we often feel alone in the world, out of touch with others, overwhelmed by our emotions, and disconnected from our own bodies and ourselves. Our world is ego-driven. We constantly...
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3 Steps Toward Managing And Healing Anxiety
I've struggled with anxiety throughout my life. A difficult childhood and my highly sensitive personality meant I grew into an anxious kid—there was just too much pain and emotional overwhelm for my young brain to handle. My anxiety most often manifested as perfectionism and people pleasing, so from the outside everything seemed great. I excelled in school and I was a good kid who did as she was told. But there was a war inside me. I felt broken, unable to navigate these huge feelings of...
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Mind Matters: Overcoming Adversity and Building Resilience Two-Day Intensive Training
with Author, Carolyn Rich Curtis, Ph.D. 8:30 AM–5:00 PM $399 for 2-day Intensive Training CEUs are available for an additional charge. Each trainee must have a copy of Mind Matters ($299 plus tax (CA and SD only) plus S/H) As a result of this training , you will learn to teach: Self-soothing skills to manage emotions Ways to analyze stressful thoughts How to deal with intrusive memories Ways to develop a protective lifestyle And you, as an instructor, will learn . . . How to provide a safe...
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My Story about Healing Moving from “What is wrong with me” to “What is happening – how can I take better care of myself?”
When I was a little girl, I had a lot of ear infections. Did anyone else experience that? Every summer in the middle of the fun of swimming in the pool, I would get an ear infection and one year I got one on my birthday. Obviously, I still remember it. It was a sad time. I always felt like I was missing out on things. And it became a pattern. I would go to the doctor and get lamb’s wool and drops put in my ear. It hurt a lot. I can still remember trying to get comfortable lying on the couch...
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Need 45 Trauma-Informed Practitioners or Clinicians For Study on Using a Brain Regulation Headband-Bellabee Designed To Help Trauma Survivors Regulate Their Brains.
Need 45 Trauma-Informed Practitioners or Clinicians For Study on Using a Brain Regulation Headband-Bellabee Designed To Help Trauma Survivors Regulate Their Brains. All trauma informed practitioners who are suffering with or who work with adults or children suffering with C-PTSD, PTSD, Developmental Trauma, Depression, Anxiety, ADHD & Sleep Disorders are welcome to apply to be considered for this study. The deadline to request and submit your application is: March 20, 2020 As a trauma...
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Need 45 Trauma-Informed Practitioners or Clinicians For Study on Using a Brain Regulation Headband-Bellabee Designed To Help Trauma Survivors Regulate Their Brains.
Need 45 Trauma-Informed Practitioners or Clinicians For Study on Using a Brain Regulation Headband-Bellabee Designed To Help Trauma Survivors Regulate Their Brains. All trauma informed practitioners who are suffering with or who work with adults or children suffering with C-PTSD, PTSD, Developmental Trauma, Depression, Anxiety, ADHD & Sleep Disorders are welcome to apply to be considered for this study. We currently have 41 applicants, and applicantions are approved on a first come first...
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Neuroplasticity and Mindfulness
To understand the treatments for complex post-traumatic stress disorder, it is helpful to understand the interaction between neuroplasticity and mindfulness.
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New Book: Crazy Was All I Ever Knew By Alice M. Kenny (pseudonym)
To this day, I still think of my childhood home as "the crazy house." Like me, millions of adult Americans are living with the effects of the precarious childhoods they experienced as offspring of mentally ill parents. If you are one of them, you can no doubt relate to my book. As a child, you most likely lived in a crazy house of your own. As an adult, you’ve probably retained and may even relive memories of your tumultuous upbringing. Crazy Was All I Ever Knew combines memoir with...