Tagged With "Parenting with ACEs"
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Parenting in a Pandemic [medium.com]
By Damon Korb, Medium, March 16, 2020 It is a well-known fact that children thrive when there are routines. This time of year most children wake up, get dressed, eat their breakfast, head off to school where they move from class to class, come home and have a snack, do some homework, have some free time or participate in an afterschool activity, eat dinner, and then get ready for bed. The daily life for most children is pretty mapped out and organized. But, as children suddenly need to stay...
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Parenting Matters: Supporting Parents of Children Ages 0-8 (The National Academies Press 2016)
A study published by The National Academies of Sciences in 2016 resulting in 10 Recommendations to build support for parents... "Over the past several decades, researchers have identified parenting- related knowledge, attitudes, and practices that are associated with improved developmental outcomes for children and around which parenting- related programs, policies, and messaging initiatives can be designed. However, consensus is lacking on the elements of parenting that are most important...
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Parenting’s Troubled History
As we learned from the CDC-Kaiser Permanente ACE Study , negative childhood experiences are often kept secret, downplayed, or repressed because of our powerful desire to put such things behind us. Unfortunately, our minds and our brains don’t work that way. Patterns can play out automatically, no matter how hard we try to be original and create our own realities. Just as it is important to know family medical history (e.g., diabetes or tuberculosis) it is equally important to know about our...
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Parenting Weekend Intensive
Our Ten Week Curriculum in Two Days!! Echo encourages all parents to come and be part of our community at the Saturday parenting classes in Echo Park. For those who live too far away or have other barriers to attending the 10-week series, we are offering our trauma-informed, nonviolent parenting class series over one weekend. In the 12-hour intensive you’ll experience an approach to raising children that is based on the latest research about brain and child development, as well as the...
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Parenting With ACEs: How You Can Support Your Toddler [sfbayview.com]
By Diana Hembree, San Francisco Bay View, November 11, 2019 “My 2-year-old keeps falling down when he tries to walk.” “My son is almost 24 months old, but all he can say is ‘mama’ and dada.’” “She just turned 2, and she still can’t follow the simplest instructions.” When your toddler misses a developmental milestone, like taking her first steps by age 2, it’s natural to fret. After all, in very rare cases, such delays may be a sign of an underlying condition. But a recent study suggests that...
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Parenting with PTSD Workshop: Getting to the Source of the Cycle
It took aging in to a very restless soul before I went looking for and found others like me ; women convinced they were “over” or “through” the ripple effects of childhood abuse, only to be blindsided by flashbacks, panic attacks and dangerous levels of hopelessness after becoming mothers. What I discovered and now aim to help others understand is how absolutely normal it is for a parenting survivor of childhood trauma to be triggered by her own child, and by doing basic acts of parenting...
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Parents worrying about coronavirus' toll on children's learning survey finds [edsource.org]
By John Fensterwald, EdSource, April 23, 2020 Buffeted by the coronavirus’ impact on their lives and on schools, Californians expressed worry about the spread of the pandemic and their personal finances, and parents in particular said they were concerned about school closures’ impact on their children’s ability to learn. But in an annual voter survey by the Public Policy Institute of California , they also gave high marks to Gov. Gavin Newsom’s handling of K-12 education and to their school...
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Paying Attention as the Most Exhausting Part of Parenting with ACEs
I used to sneak away for a hot bath as often as possible when my daughter was in the need-me-every-minute years. I'd soak long past when the water went cold and I felt guilty at times but sometimes I needed to be alone. To read poetry. To have some physical space. To exhale. I didn't always know where or how to pamper or self-care myself. There were few adults I trusted. I believed in attachment-style parenting and wanted to be there all of the time. And that even made me feel guilty when I...
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Personal and Parental Reflections on Adverse Childhood Experiences
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jUJHvbPrL0I
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Personal Touch Beats Technology for Parent-School Communication, Survey Finds [edweek.org]
By Jake Maher, Education Week, February 20, 2020 A new report from the Center for American Progress finds that personalization—not technology—is seen as the most important feature of good parent-school communication by key players in the public school community. CAP senior consultant Meg Benner and research associate Abby Quirk surveyed more than 900 parents who were broadly representative of the public school population, along with more than 400 teachers and more than 400 school leaders, to...
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Prevention: Bringing Baby Home Training for Faciliators
A friend of mine recently referred her grandchild and his pregnant wife to a Bringing Baby Home class, because she noticed that the wife had a horrible background of abuse and at times had difficulty functioning. What the grandmother noticed with this couple was a change in the family dynamics. the couple knows how to get along, the father is engaged in parenting, and the baby thriving. This is really starting at the root of the problem. 20 years ago, Drs. John and Julie Gottman worked with...
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Promoting Trauma-Informed Parenting of Children in Out-of-Home Care: An Effectiveness Study of the Resource Parent Curriculum. (Abstract Only) [psycnet.apa.org]
By Kathryn J. Murray, Kelly M. Sullivan, Maria C. Lent, et al., APA PsycNET, March 2020 Abstract The Resource Parent Curriculum (RPC) is a workshop designed to promote trauma-informed parenting among foster, adoptive, and kinship caregivers (i.e., resource parents). The ultimate goal of RPC is to improve placement stability and promote healing from traumatic stress in children who have been placed in out-of-home care. The current study examined data from multiple RPC implementation sites...
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Protecting Our Children's Mental Health During the Pandemic
Our physical health is not the only form of health that is in jeopardy right now. The emotional health of our families is also at risk, and it can help to take proactive steps now to mitigate psychological damage to your children and prevent a silent aftermath of this outbreak.
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Puzzle Pieces
A 5000 piece puzzle that was thrown up in the air and scattered amongst the fall leaves. That is how I imagined my life looked liked 6+ years ago. I was struggling with flashbacks, body memories, brain fog, panic attacks, insomnia and dissociation. My trauma history was coming crashing in on me and impacting EVERY area of my life. I no longer could pull myself up, dusting myself off and with head down barreling though life. I had to face my past and put together the pieces of that puzzle one...
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Re: Reimbursement for Parenting Education and Support Services
Dear Stephanie: This is FANTASTIC information! I'm printing the paper out right now so I can read it and will reply later tonight. Thank you so much for sharing this! Cissy
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Re: Reimbursement for Parenting Education and Support Services
Dear Stephanie: I hope parenting education gets reimbursed and am glad to have read more on the topic. It makes me want to learn more about the parent support programs that exist, which ones are trauma informed or use peers, what makes them evidence based or not, and what people charge and/or have to pay for parenting support. This is important and needed and parent supports helps parents and families. it's hard to show the exact ways it's cost effective, in the long run, to work more on...
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Re: Tell Me About You
A piece of my personal journey... I recall being stunned by how much my own history and past kept rearing its ugly head as parent of 3 children under the age of 1. I so desperately wanted to be a "great" parent. I read A LOT of parenting and self-help books and worked hard to put into practice what I learned. It was so frustrating to not understand why I had to constantly re-frame and fight urges to react in the ways that didn't align with the parent or person that I wanted to be. Through my...
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Re: Tell Me About You
Robin: Thank you for this post. I have met so many parents (and I am one as well) that was incredible relieved and frightened by finding out about ACEs. To me, it's a motivating fear not a paralyzing one. And it's SO MUCH work to reframe. I so get that. There's effort in shaping behaviors and feelings and impulses. And that's why I think self-care comes in or meditation or all the things that give support for that work. Change can't happen just because we hope or wish for it - though that's...
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Re: 5 Tickets to See Wrestling Ghosts, a New Documentary About Breaking the Cycle of Trauma!
Charlotte: THANK YOU for this offer. That was ONE MOVING film. I saw it last week. It's so honest, so raw, so real, so powerful. I know it's going to open up SO many conversations and so much healing for parents and those who work with parents. It was painful, truthful, realistic, and also offered a view into how slow healing can be, and necessary, painful, beautiful, arduous. I kept wondering how the heck the mother was able to afford all those modalities and supports as well. Anyhow, it's...
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Re: Review of Wrestling Ghosts (Documentary About Breaking the Cycle of Trauma) & Tickets
Excellent review Cissy, I am planning on hosting a screening in my school community this fall.
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Re: Review of Wrestling Ghosts (Documentary About Breaking the Cycle of Trauma) & Tickets
Robin! I think it will be great and you will love it - especially combined with your community café model.
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ACE education for parents - Jane's piece
Check out this encouraging bit of news in Jane's new story on ACES Too High entitled "Troubled moms and dads learn how to parent with ACEs." (It's also on ACEsConnection.com .) "Since April 2014, more than 1,100 parents have learned about ACEs in parenting classes in three jails and two treatment facilities in Davidson and Rutherford counties, and in four classes at the Family Center. The entire set of parenting classes lasts eight weeks; in the county jails, they last six weeks. After...
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ACEs Science and Racism
This is a collection of resources regarding structural racism and trauma. This list aims to give a broad overview and is not all-inclusive. We welcome suggestions; if you have any, please comment below! The titles below and the PDFs in attachments are in alphabetical order. BSC Full Report Trauma Resilient Informed City Baltimore: This is the full report of the work, data, lessons, and direct quotes from several teams of people from various backgrounds in the Baltimore community as they...
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Adults: Let's Take Teen Relationships and Dating Violence Seriously
Adults, pull up a chair. It's time for us to talk. February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness month. In cases reviewed by the Georgia Domestic Violence Fatality Review Project , nearly fifty percent of domestic violence homicide victims began their relationships with their perpetrators between the ages of 13-24. Adults, we need to take intimate and dating relationships between young people seriously. As defined by Loveisrespect.org , teen dating violence is "a pattern of behaviors one person...
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Almost 60 Percent of Parents With Children Aged 14 to 18 Reported Them Being Bullied [comparitech.com]
By Paul Bischoff, Comparitech, May 8, 2019 Bullying used to be depicted as kids being shoved into lockers and coerced out of their lunch money by the older, more popular rulers of the school. Nowadays, the focus on bullying has shifted to those hiding behind computer screens and taunting others in the virtual world. While in-school bullying is on the rise, technology and social media have created alternate avenues for bullies to wreak havoc. Whether bullying is done on school grounds or over...
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Announcing a New Parenting and ACEs Blog from Stress Health, an Initiative of the Center for Youth Wellness
Research shows that the right kind of support and care can mitigate the impact of toxic stress in children and help them bounce back.
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As Youth Suicides Climb, Anguished Parents Begin to Speak Out [khn.org]
By Sharon Jayson, Kaiser Health News, March 10, 2020 Alec Murray was 13. He enjoyed camping, fishing and skiing. At home, it was video games, movies and books. Having just completed middle school with “almost straight A’s,” those grades were going to earn him an iPhone for his upcoming birthday. Instead, he killed himself on June 8 — the first day of summer break. Caleb Stenvold was 14. He was a high school freshman in the gifted and talented program. He ran track and played defensive...
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Attachment Parenting helping to prevent ACEs
The ACE study has demonstrated how impactful adverse childhood experiences are on an individual; impacting mental, emotional and social growth as well as negatively affecting physical health. In recent years professionals have turned their focus to the prevention of ACEs and one thing stands out. We must address the intergenerational transmission of these adverse experiences. But how do we do that? One of the answers lies in our parenting skills. Research has shown that early life...
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Better Training for Foster Parents Could Have Changed My Life [chronicleofsocialchange.org]
When I was 11 years old, I went to the doctor for a check-up and my whole world stopped. In that one moment, the family I had spent six months becoming a part of decided against adoption. I was removed from my biological mother at just six months, and this was the closest I had ever been to joining a family. One week before a judge made me somebody’s daughter, my almost-parents decided that they did not want “a kid with a baby.” “You’re pregnant!” “What were you thinking?” “There are...
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Bill On Governor’s Desk Aims To Reduce Childhood Trauma By Diverting Parents Into Treatment, Instead Of Prison [witnessla.com]
By Taylor Walker, Witness LA, September 13, 2019 An estimated 10 million US children have parents who are currently locked up, or who have previously been incarcerated. A bill currently on Governor Gavin Newsom’s desk, SB 394, seeks to reduce the number of parents and children separated by incarceration by boosting diversion. Children arguably suffer the worst consequences of mass incarceration. In 2014, a UC Irvine study found that having a parent behind bars can be more damaging to a kid’s...
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Bringing Baby Home Educator Training
Bringing Baby Home Facilitator Training comes to Santa Ana, November 14-15, 2019. Research continues to show that our children are most fragile in the first years of their life. Even the strongest relationships are strained during the transition to parenthood. Lack of sleep, never-ending housework and new fiscal concerns can lead to profound stress and a decline in marital satisfaction – all of which affect baby’s care. Not surprisingly, 67% of new parents experience conflict, disappointment...
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Can Trained, Paid Peer Support Help New York City Keep Foster Parents? [chronicleofsocialchange.org]
By Megan Conn, The Chronicle of Social Change, December 2, 2019 When Roxanne Williams became a foster parent four years ago, she started in the deep end of the parenting pool. New York City child welfare workers brought her a boy with limited English on a Friday afternoon and left after confirming her home was safe, leaving Williams to muddle through their first days together on her own. “It was rough – you weren’t getting the calls back [from her foster care agency] as fast as you wanted...
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Careful, It's Not Over Yet & Parenting with ACEs & PTSD
Note: Dawn Daum & Joyelle Bran dt are the featured guests on the live chat held in the Parenting with ACEs Group on Tuesday, June 13th at 10 AM PST / 1 PM PST. The topic is Parenting with PTSD & ACEs. Dawn and Joyelle are artists, activists and parents. They met a few years ago and set about creating an online community for parent survivors to working to break the cycle of abuse. Here's a small sample of the work they have done and are doing: Wrote a resource about Parenting as an...
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Echo Training and Certification Course
In the fall, Echo will be rolling out the new Training & Certification Course (TCC) for selected candidates who want to become certified in the Echo trauma-informed, nonviolent parenting curriculum. This is the first time Echo will be offering the certification course since 2016. We've been spending the intervening time systematically revising the old parenting curriculum, bringing it up-to-date with the trauma and resilience information that we are already teaching in the parenting...
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Re: Parenting as a Survivor Keynote to Follow Free Resilience Screening
Dawn, You are so badass that my heart is bursting with pride!!!! You are going to be beyond terrific! I hope I can be there to hear you!!!!!!!! Go get em' girl! XOXO, Em
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Re: Parenting as a Survivor Keynote to Follow Free Resilience Screening
Thanks, Emily. I'm nervous for sure. It is a much bigger stage than I'm used to. Which both excites me and makes me want to vomit big, vulnerable chunks! Seeing the faces of my LMPs in the audience will be my savior. 💜
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Re: Parenting as a Survivor Keynote to Follow Free Resilience Screening
Yahoo!!!! Go Dawn!!!!
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Re: Prevention: Bringing Baby Home Training for Faciliators
I am sorry I posted the wrong dates; May 17-18, 2018 in Sacramento. Thank you, Carolyn
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Re: Fathers, Sons, and Intimacy: A Story of Moving Past Childhood Adversity
Hello Hillary Thanks for being a woman who STILL AFFIRMS MEN in a LIFE AFFIRMING WAY. Yes there is a TOXIC MASCULINITY in men are trying to find themselves. Taking off the MASK WE LIVE IN. We all have a "Mask of pretention" putting our best foot forward and that is NOT A GENDER PROBLEM. That is a HUMAN PROBLEM. Rick
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Re: Imagine living inside a box buried inside a box buried inside a box...
I do not know how we approach this.... But WE MUST.... This is what I have to say: When I was in medical school at Michigan, I was ready to commit suicide. Having attendings throw things against the wall was too much for me. There were no books to help people who were really messed up by their parent's except "Toxic Parents" which I read a 1000 Times. I didn't know what to do. I decided to get a parenting book from Barnes and Noble. I read it and I was floored. I didn’t have a clue how...
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Re: France's Early Learning / Positive Parenting Train set to launch tomorrow
Helena: THANK you for posting about this amazing and ambitious and important work! I hope you'll report in about how it goes and what the results are and share lots of photos! Cis
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Re: Trauma-Informed Parenting: What Adoptive & Foster Parents Can Teach, Part 2
So - I just came across this when doing a search for "foster." In my EXTREMELY new project of screening caregivers of children for ACEs, I am running across children with high ACEs and foster/adoptive parents who are saying - oh everything is all right - they are out of that situation now but yet they are bringing the children to the dr for multiple issues, especially ADHD... I am thinking I need to develop a resource specifically for foster parents about ACEs because they say this and then...
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Re: Trauma-Informed Parenting: What Adoptive & Foster Parents Can Teach, Part 2
Tina: The Attachment and Trauma Network (ATN) is AWESOME and does so much to help with this issue. For those who don't have ACEs, there is sometimes a not knowing or realizing the full impact, because it may not show up til later. Many wish they had known or done more earlier and many speaks lots about when love isn't enough. It's what has helped many learn about trauma, and how loss of birth family, birth language, birth culture is a lot of loss and trauma even if there isn't abuse,...
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Re: When a Mother Loves an Alcoholic - Parenting With ACEs
Lisa: This is beautiful and honest and hopeful. And you make me think, as your writing always does, about some of the impacts I don't always think about in my own life or in my own mothering. THANK you!!! Please keep sharing. I started to highlight the lines I loved but there were too many. Cissy
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Re: Making the Good Stuff Louder: Trauma Dad, Bryon Hamel
thank you for trusting our community and sharing your story, Byron. And thank you Cissy for capturing his words! This quote really resonates for me. Through persistence we can break the cycle! . Just because a train can be put back on its rails doesn't mean damage is negated when it comes off of them. The truth is, this is a relentless fight. It is forever. The victory is in the persistence.
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Re: Making the Good Stuff Louder: Trauma Dad, Bryon Hamel
Gail: Isn't he AMAZING? So inspiring. I love learning from people parenting with ACEs and feel grateful for place and space to share experiences, perspectives and expertise. Cissy
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Re: How to Become a Compassionate Parent
Thanks for this very concrete and useful post and list! I so appreciate you saying we cant go back to change our parenting but we def can choose today to "create new healthy memories as a family. Today we can begin again!
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Re: How to Become a Compassionate Parent
Svava: This brought a tear to my eye. Thank you for being so honest and hopeful. It must have been painful to hear you weren't there for your daughter, but it sounds like you got a chance to re-parent her in the way you were able to respond. That's so hopeful and realistic because parenting is hard and we often don't know what we don't or didn't know, til later. But it is not too late. Thank you for this. I'm sharing on Facebook, too. Cissy