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Parenting with PACEs. PACEs science & stories. Trauma-informed change.

First-Person Stories & Parent-Led Solutions

Family Hui parenting groups highlight ACEs science, love and empowerment

photo courtesy of Diana Rivas Diana Rivas had studied child development as an undergraduate, but it wasn’t until she joined a parenting group in 2019 in Davis, California, that she began to reflect on the way she herself was raised — and punished. Diana Rivas “My dad had experienced a lot of abuse,” she recalls. “He was raised in a small town in Mexico, and his father had used heavy corporal punishment against him. He did the same with me, because he thought that was the way discipline...

Many Parents Say Teens With Anxiety, Depression May Benefit From Peer Confidants at School [healthblog.uofmhealth.org]

By Beata Mostafavi, Michigan Health, January 18, 2021 An estimated one in five teenagers has symptoms of a mental health disorder such as depression or anxiety, and suicide is the second leading cause of death among teens. But the first person a teen confides in may not always be an adult – they may prefer to talk to another teen. And three-quarters of parents in a new national poll think peers better understand teen challenges, compared to teachers or counselors in the school. The majority...

The Surviving Spirit Newsletter March 2020

Hi Folks, The March edition of the Surviving Spirit Newsletter is posted at the website - http://newsletters.survivingspirit.com/index.php To sign up for an e-mail copy, please write to me @ mikeskinner@comcast.net or sign up @ Website via Contact Us. PDF - http://newsletters.survivingspirit.com/pdfs/2020-03The_Surviving_Spirit_Newsletter_March_2020.pdf Thanks! Michael. Healing the Heart Through the Creative Arts, Education & Advocacy Hope, Healing & Help for Trauma, Abuse &...

The Surviving Spirit Newsletter February 2020

Hi Folks, The latest edition of the Surviving Spirit Newsletter is posted at the website - http://newsletters.survivingspirit.com/index.php or http://newsletters.survivingspirit.com/pdfs/2020-02-The_Surviving_Spirit_Newsletter_February_2020.pdf To sign up for an e-mail copy, please write to me @ mikeskinner@comcast.net or sign up @ Website via Contact Us, Thanks! Michael. Newsletter Contents : 1] This coat design isn't just saving lives. It's launching new careers for homeless people – CNN...

What I Learned About Resilience in the Midst of Grief (greatergood.berkeley.edu)

Losing her daughter put Lucy Hone's resilience research to the test. Parental bereavement is considered to be the hardest of all losses to bear , meaning that, when you lose a child, you are swamped with support—some of it helpful, some less so. In the days after the girls died, we were told we should expect to write off the next five years to grief, and handed pamphlets explaining how “grief is as individual as a fingerprint” and outlining Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s five stages of grief .

Father and Son – Two Grown Men Saying Goodbye (upliftconnect.com)

James Blunt wrote and filmed the song for his father who is dying of cancer and does not have long to live. He asked his father to be in the video. The words, ‘You’re not my father, I’m not your son. We’re just two grown men saying goodbye.’ astound me. The spiritual significance in these words is monumental. The dignity and the honour that is imbued in these words is so humbling. I interpret those words as: beyond our assigned Earthly roles of father and son, as equals on this spiritual...

A New Year's Thoughts

Wishing you a Happy New Year of Peace, Joy, Love, Hope & Healing. Take care, Michael. "JOY" - a song of thanks to all of those in my life - performed at the NYAPRS Conference 9/13 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=by4tWjowZVo “JOY”© Michael Skinner Music There’s joy in knowing what I have found There’s joy in knowing that I’m still around There’s joy in knowing that I still care Joy in knowing you’re still there Joy in knowing you’re still there I’m so glad you’re still around Thanks for...

A Grandfather With Vitiligo Knits Dolls to Restore the Self-Esteem of Children Who Suffer From This Disease (brightside.me)

Vitiligo is a disease that affects almost 3 million Brazilians and consists of the loss of skin color in certain body areas. Although there are numerous treatments to fight the condition, the most difficult aspect to cope with is other people’s prejudice toward those who suffer from it. João Stanganelli, now 64, began to show signs of vitiligo at 38. He worked in the gastronomy industry, but, due to a heart problem, his life radically changed last year. However, João didn’t allow this...

Birth Trauma, an anniversary

For mothers who experienced traumatic births, these birthdays are the cruelest of celebrations. We are supposed to smile and shower love on our children, and never admit that on these days we would really love to curl up in a ball and sob. We are not supposed to say that having our children took too high a toll on our physical and mental health. We are not supposed to mention just how badly our medical and social systems failed to support us when we needed it the most.

The Decision that Changed My Life

Four years ago, I decided to start a conversation about the long term impact of childhood abuse. More specifically, about what happens when those abused children grow up and have children of their own. When I had become a parent, I went looking for books on this topic, and I didn’t find anything. But I knew I couldn’t be the only one who was dealing with this. And once I found one other person who was willing to write about this, I said, let’s collect these stories. The stories of these...

Puzzle Pieces

A 5000 piece puzzle that was thrown up in the air and scattered amongst the fall leaves. That is how I imagined my life looked liked 6+ years ago. I was struggling with flashbacks, body memories, brain fog, panic attacks, insomnia and dissociation. My trauma history was coming crashing in on me and impacting EVERY area of my life. I no longer could pull myself up, dusting myself off and with head down barreling though life. I had to face my past and put together the pieces of that puzzle one...

The Relentless School Nurse: Parenting with High ACEs – Voices of Lived Expertise

Christine “Cissy” White is leading a movement to make sure that parents with high Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) scores have the resources and support they need to end the trend of generational trauma that so many have i nherited and unknowingly passed on to their children. The voice of the parent is first and foremost in Cissy’s plan of action. To reach this goal, Cissy had to first find her own voice, which she has done brilliantly through writing, speaking and leading workshops.

An Open Letter to Teachers

My son and my daughter, like all the children who fill the desks in your classroom, come to school every day prepared to do the best they can and they will give you the opportunity to help them. My children may struggle in ways that frustrate you or in ways that you do not understand. They perceive, process, and express information differently than most people do.

5 Tickets to See Wrestling Ghosts, a New Documentary About Breaking the Cycle of Trauma!

Hi ACEs Parenting Community! Wrestling Ghosts , a new documentary about breaking the cycle of trauma, will be premiering at LA Film Festival on September 27th. The Wrestling Ghosts team wants to give away 5 tickets to the ACEs parenting community. We want the film to promote wellness in the ACEs community, and get watched by folks who would really love it. Tickets are first come, first serve; if you'd like to purchase one after the giveaway, try to get them this week; earlybird tickets are...

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