Tagged With "Neglect"

One of the most common euphemisms and justifications for a certain type of childhood trauma is “growing up too fast.” It is a euphemism because it is used to minimize the pain that the person felt as a child when their needs weren’t being met by describing it in seemingly neutral or even positive language. It’s a justification because it is often used to argue that growing up faster and becoming “mature beyond your years” is indeed a good thing. We will explore and address all of this here.

Part of the damage from abuse and neglect in childhood is what actually happened when we were kids. But a significant part of the problem today comes from what I call "Inside Traumas." These are self-defeating behaviors that are common to people who are frequently in a state of dysregulation. They start as an innocent attempt to feel calm and stable, but they can grow into significant traumas that cause real problems for us and others. If you'd like to learn about my online course, Healing...

While I agree that these behaviors can be re-traumatizing and are characteristic of dysregulation, in my mind they are all simply symptoms of unaddressed, untreated/undertreated trauma. They're the "cries for help" that tell the person experiencing them (and maybe the people around them) that there's something not quite right. But even after effective treatment of childhood trauma, they can still crop up because those old habits we developed to survive all those years ago die very hard.

Latchkey Urchins & Friends is a podcast by me* and my co-host Anne Sherry, a therapist. We explore different topics within The Nurturance Void, the space left when we experienced childhood emotional neglect. Childhood emotional neglect happens between parents and their kids, within families, across generations, in communities, in nations, and in policies and programs. We seek to heal through humor and holding space. Each week a guest shares their childhood emotional neglect stories,...

“Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom.” ~George S. Patton Much of the difficulty and struggle that we go through in life comes from our resistance to change. At some point, we get stuck in painful circumstances, yet we fear facing our reality and doing the work required to ignite a positive change. After all, the enemy we know is better than the enemy we don’t know. “It’s not that bad”, we tell ourselves. So we settle, give up on our desires, try to make the best of what we...