Tagged With "start your own book study"

Hi Everyone: I'm building out the resources for this group. I'd love to know what you have needed in your own parenting or in the work you have done/are doing with parents parenting with ACEs. If there are any good books, videos, handouts or anything you've heard are helpful, please share. If you have any comments or insights that you've said or heard people talking about needing, like more community or places to learn how to parent differently, etc., please share those as well. Thanks so...

I used to sneak away for a hot bath as often as possible when my daughter was in the need-me-every-minute years. I'd soak long past when the water went cold and I felt guilty at times but sometimes I needed to be alone. To read poetry. To have some physical space. To exhale. I didn't always know where or how to pamper or self-care myself. There were few adults I trusted. I believed in attachment-style parenting and wanted to be there all of the time. And that even made me feel guilty when I...

Let's create a list of resources useful for parenting ourselves and children. These can be books about child development or self-help books or a work of fiction that had important wisdom. If there's a title that's helped you or someone you know, love or work with as it relates to parenting, please share. For me, my absolute favorite is this: There's Nothing Wrong with You: Going Beyond Self-Hate , Cheri Huber This book is not about parenting. It's not about how-to parent I should say but it...

Dear Parenting with ACEs Community, We just launched a new trauma-informed children's book series called Venus and Her Fly Trip . The series has been developed in collaboration with therapists, educators, parents and healers and is designed to promote mental/social/emotional health, body positivity and imaginative play in kids 4-10 , with the ultimate goal of preventing self-hatred. I would greatly value hearing the feedback of the ACEs community on this endeavor, and welcome your ideas for...

Hi Everyone: I hope you are holding up o.k. I know it's early days but I'm already pretty stretched, strained, and worried. So, if you didn't see on the main page, I wanted to draw your attention to a few free things that are nurturing, calming, and can help you, especially if you are parenting and parenting with ACEs. I know I'm not the best parent I can be when I'm in survival mode so these things are welcome. Please share others as I know there are resources being offered to those that...

Melissa: Great questions. I'm going to tag a few others to chime in as well. @Karen Clemmer @Rene Howitt @Rebekah Couch @Emily Read Daniels @Louise Godbold @Dawn Daum @Joyelle Brandt have all done presentations about ACEs, as have I. I'm sure we all do them differently and have experiences and thoughts on what does/doesn't work. My opinion is that sharing from the place of WE and US and OUR is most important. We are all impacted by the ACEs we do or do not carry. If we carry lots, that's a...

Hi Melissa - I agree with Cissy! In my experience families want information , presented in a non judgmental, safe, caring way. They are often open to conversations and at the same time they (may) need additional support to understand at a visceral level that it is what happened to them - not what is wrong with them. They did the best they could at the time - whatever that looked like. Knowledge is power. Typically I might mention that lots of us in this room have higher ACE scores including...

Melissa....I always start off my ACEs presentation by asking the audience to go back to their own childhood. Think about their siblings, parents, living room and home. As children we are not responsible for what may have happened to us and also had no control over those actions. I tell them "I know that you will be tempted to think about your own marriage, children and parenting but if you stay there this will feel like finger pointing. That is not the purpose of the presentation."...

Hi Naketta, Please find a couple of blog posts for your perusal that may prove beneficial as conversation starters. https://www.pacesconnection.com/...ty-sciencedirect-com https://www.pacesconnection.com/...e-wmcactionnews5-com https://www.pacesconnection.com/...he-roots-of-violence In her book For Your Own Good: Hidden Cruelty in Child-Rearing and the Roots of Violence , Miller hammers home her provocative stance that the root causes of ALL violence are a consequence of childhood trauma. Of...

Daniel Siegel book The Whole Brain Child is a much easier read. Our Circle of Parents groups in Minnesota have used it with much success. He now has a workbookey that goes along with it.

I have a long history of personal and professional experience with childhood trauma. In the past 12+ years, I have been doing childhood trauma training. A number of years ago I was was privileged to experience educating parents, in community forums, about ACEs and Resilience. I really wanted a second voice - a parent who could reflect, parent to parent, about their experience having had early trauma. I invited several folks to do this, and it was very difficult for them. Having a son who is...

HI Pam: I just watched the video and it's WONDERFUL. It's SO GOOD!!! I bet it's wonderful for use in workshops. I will look for the book as well. I'm thrilled you are here. I'd love to talk to you about your work, in a Q&A to share in this group if you are willing. I'll send you a private message as well. Cissy

From my experience, 'a group format' is more powerful when participants take OFF their 'professional hats,' and begin by identify the 'quadrant' they are in at the moment they are sharing. (Ex: head/intellectual, heart/emotional, hands & feet/action/relational, soul/believing.) Using this as a starting place allows a leveling playing field of connection, vs divide. Of understanding where one is coming from into the discussion. For example, after I read the posts above, I found myself in...

Jackie: Thank you for your thoughts. I agree with you about not dividing the group because so many of us do wear several different hats, and conversing, from all the perspectives, including ones not our own, is what makes this group so potentially powerful. If you have any resources to share, or more thoughts, and feelings or ideas, please keep sharing! Cissy

Re: Books to Support Parenting with ACEs?

Akacia: Hello. Nice to meet you. I'm the Community Manager for this community and I really hope you'll share your blog posts HERE. I think your perspective is key and I appreciate how much you shared. There are over 300 hundred of us here and many of us are parents or work with parents (have ACEs, kids or people we love or work with have ACEs) and we're all learning about trauma informed EVERYTHING and how we can heal and help support and understand our kids and be there for our kids. I love...

Dawn: This is a great question and will make the book even more useful. Are you looking for survivor-led or co-led, only, initiatives, or everything and anything? Cissy

I work with ParentingBeyondPunishment to provide parenting support for parents with ACEs. Here is a sample free webinar series we did to help parents with their own self regulation and their children. http://stopspanking.org/nip/resiliency/

I think there are a lot of resources that can help parents who are parenting with ACEs. Two books offering a lot of very practical support are both older classics-- How To Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk (Faber & Mazlish) and Parent Effectiveness Training (P.E.T.) by Thomas Gordon Both these books contain information and practical examples that can help parents become more resourced for responding constructively in moments or situations that are likely to be...

HI Melissa: I know it's WAY late and I apologize for not seeing your question earlier! While I don't favor screening of parents I'm all for sharing surveys with parents. I don't favor screening til the medical, insurance, and screening places doing screenings have addressed race, gender, class, disability, homophobia and basically all kinds of bias since we know those most impacted most with most risks for ACE-associated issues are poor, female, LBGTQ, of color, and struggling with emotional...