Tagged With "Kathleen Friend"
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Prevention: Bringing Baby Home Training for Faciliators
A friend of mine recently referred her grandchild and his pregnant wife to a Bringing Baby Home class, because she noticed that the wife had a horrible background of abuse and at times had difficulty functioning. What the grandmother noticed with this couple was a change in the family dynamics. the couple knows how to get along, the father is engaged in parenting, and the baby thriving. This is really starting at the root of the problem. 20 years ago, Drs. John and Julie Gottman worked with...
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Anxious Parenting
When my daughter was younger I was anxious. I didn't have full-blown anxiety attacks, as some do. I had an almost constant anxiety motoring within me. It was mixed with dread. Sometimes, it lasted days. Other times weeks. It would come and go. It always returned. When it did, it was hard to read, concentrate or focus. It was hard to eat or sleep or work. It was hard to parent. How I felt in my body scared me and I wanted to be someone else. Anxious time moved slowly. An hour felt like a...
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Beyond Trauma: Building Resilience to ACEs (brochure)
Wish you had a fairly easy and short way to share all about ACEs? Wish it was in-depth enough to share with teachers, doctors, nurses and therapists but not so long or jargony it puts family and friends to sleep? Here's the perfect thing to share when you've been all up in the faces with ACEs and want to back up your words before, during or after. This brochure is comprehensive but not so long that it remains in the "I'll get to it later," pile. Please feel free to print, forward, download...
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CA pediatrician develops, tests, gets state OK for whole-child assessment tool that includes ACEs
Over the last dozen years or so, many pediatricians, astounded by the ramifications of the science of adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) on the children they care for, began integrating this science into their practices. The most common approach has been to ask parents about ACEs using a questionnaire, and to use this information to counsel parents and identify resources for the family. Different practices have been using different questionnaires: Some ask parents for their ACE scores...
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CA pediatrician develops, tests, gets state OK for whole-child assessment tool that includes ACEs
[Editor's note: This blog was first posted in April 2017. Dr. Marie-Mitchell updated the assessment by modifying a few of the questions, so we are republishing with the new assessment, one in Spanish and one in English.] Over the last dozen years or so, many pediatricians, astounded by the ramifications of the science of adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) on the children they care for, began integrating this science into their practices. The most common approach has been to ask parents...
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Cancer as a survivor
Many people use the phrase CPTSD to stand for PTSD from complex trauma. To me, C-PTSD means cancer and PTSD. I have cancer and I’m a trauma survivor. I’m a survivor with cancer but not yet a cancer survivor. Will I be a survivor squared?
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Cannitta’s Story: Surviving, Not Living (www.lsnj.org)
I just saw this video and comment on my friend Heidi's Facebook page and it made me teary. Here's the video: Here's Heidi's comment: I hope she does because she's been a mom at 16 who is poor and has an ACE score of 9 and who has had to fight to become and to feel safe. We need people like Heidi running programs and organizing support because getting it, having lived it makes one know things those who haven't don't.
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Children & Families COVID19 Resilience Brief 5: Music For Healing
Click on the pdf link for the full child-friendly article.
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Medications for PTSD Tied to Increase Dementia Risk & Commentary / www.mentalhealthexcellence.org
Note: I just saw this article , and it's one alarming and depressing read and super relevant read. Lots of us take these medications and/or have kids, parents, and partners who do as well. Did you know about the increased risk for dementia associated with them? I didn't. To evaluate possible effects, the investigators turned to a nationwide sample of 417,172 US veterans aged 56 years or older who had not been diagnosed with dementia or mild cognitive impairment at baseline in 2003 and for...
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Coronavirus Sanity Guide (FREE) (www.tenpercent.com)
My friend Lynn keeps sharing this guide on social media. While most of us are sharing news, and maybe panic, she is inviting her loved ones to find a bit of calm and comfort online. She said she likes the content and the app so I checked it out and there are free resources such as guided meditations, pre-recorded talks, and a daily live podcast at 3 p.m. EST. For the healthcare workers who are really stretched and stressed, there's free access to the 10% happier app. Here's an excerpt from...
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Divorce During Christmas
My home was flooded just weeks before my divorce was final. The ocean spilled over the sea wall and headed down the street carrying telephone poles, patio furniture and boat parts. It was 2 a.m. and I was in my bedroom with the cat as my daughter was with her father on one of her first overnights. I was knee deep in despair. And fear. The ocean pooled around my stairs, foundations and car. Outside, the flood would take my blue Subaru, dog fence and air conditioner. Inside, it was thr heating...
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Dr. Claudia Gold: Empathy & Listening as ACE-Informed Practice
"You are absolutely not doomed from having ACEs."
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Dr. Gabor Maté & Full-Potential Parenting, Even When It Is Hard
Note: Allison Morris had dozens of experts in her summit series through Full-Potential Parenting. I took notes only on those by Donna Jackson Nakazawa , Gabe Maté and Sebern Fisher (coming later this month). Though the audios are no longer available, for free, they can be purchased for $100. or less (depending on the year), here. Forgive me for sounding like an advertisement, I don't know Allison personally. I am a huge fan of all parent-led resources and wish I discovered this series...
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Each Mind Matters: Raising Awareness For Men's Mental Health
“Don't Drive Like My Brother!” Sound familiar? “Car Talk” is the highly popular, long-running radio show hosted by two brothers who dispense colorful advice to callers to help them solve their car problems. Imagine for a moment a similar show where men – and those who care about them – called in every Sunday morning to ask how to tune up their mental health, to keep their emotions from overheating, or their mind running smoothly? Traditionally, men are raised to be self-sufficient, tough,...
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Early childhood educators learn new ways to spot trauma triggers, build resilience in preschoolers
A hug may be comforting to many children, but for a child who has experienced trauma it may not feel safe.
That’s an example used by Julie Kurtz, co-director of trauma informed practices in early childhood education at the WestEd Center for Child & Family Studies (CCFS), as she begins a trauma training session. Her audience, preschool teachers and staff of the San Francisco-based Wu Yee Children’s Services at San Francisco’s Women’s Building, listen attentively.
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Re: Parenting: A Cultural Perspective from Dr. Darcia Narvaez and Others
Hello! I am writing to share a wonderful new resource from the Vital Village Network’s friend and partner, Charles C. Daniels, Jr. Charles is the Founder and CEO of Fathers’ Uplift, which works to assist fathers in overcoming barriers (financial barriers, addiction barriers, oppressive barriers, emotional barriers and traumatic barriers) that prevent them from remaining engaged in their children’s lives. Charles’s book “Pre-Father Care: Prenatal Care for Fathers” is now available for...
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Re: 2 Interviews with Dr. Bruce Perry
I just love this gem I remember as a teen in order to escape from my chaotic home, I'd go to spend weekends at my friend's place. Her parents were always accepting, never asking too many questions - her mother would make me something to eat which psychologically was hugely healing, while her dad would be silently around tolerating our teen antics. We'd stay up late at night, giggling and her mom would come around admonishing us to sleep. Having their home to go to is what saved me from...
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Re: 13 Reasons Why & Talking Points for Families (www.sscps.org - Counseling Department)
This is great, Cissy - thank you. I think conversations around ACEs - what they are and how they can change a brain in a manner that conscious, discerning, reasoned thought (which often is not even developed) is overridden by the stress response and thus leaves a teen without the tool it needs to "think" and know suicide is not the answer - could be a huge help. If teens understand ACEs, then a close friend may know what their friend's home life is like and realize that friend has...
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Re: How parents cause children's friendships to end [sciencedaily.com]
I love that someone is addressing this issue, which was a big one for me. I remember a time, in fifth grade, a friend came over (uninvited by me--I knew better than that) and, not being used to the screaming and yelling that was par for the course in my home, she ended up locking herself in the bathroom, crying hysterically and begging to go home. It didn't bode well for my budding social life, as you can well imagine. I get a clenched stomach to this day thinking about it. Only good to come...
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Re: 13 Reasons Why & Talking Points for Families (www.sscps.org - Counseling Department)
Lisa: Thank you! I'm so grateful you are part of this community and doing this work and helping all of us do this work as well! You are right, awareness about ACEs can help, and that stats on high ACEs and death by suicide are SO important. Thanks for calling out the connection so clearly! And how talking, sharing and understanding can help! And the link! Cissy
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Re: How parents cause children's friendships to end [sciencedaily.com]
Jill: What a painful memory. Thank you for sharing. I feel for the kid you were and also for your childhood friend. This part of the study is also important: "A surprising finding from the study that was contrary to the researchers' expectations was that they did not find any evidence that positive parenting behaviors like warmth and affection altered the stability of children's best friendships. "We were hoping that positive behaviors would help extend the life of friendships and that it...
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Cheatsheet Drugs.pdf
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Re: Cannitta’s Story: Surviving, Not Living (www.lsnj.org)
Thank you for sharing this. I am not going to watch just before I go to sleep. I am so blessed to have that option. To not watch this video. So many people who “live” this video are not living. Chronic trauma is just breathing enough to stay alive. Never getting a full breath. I think that is part of the reason so many people in poverty have asthma. That and mold infested apartments. So I will watch this in the morning, so I can “sleep well.” And I will say prayers that this mom, and you and...
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Re: An unexpectedly beautiful view of fatherhood, from the bathroom floor (www.washingtonpost.com)
Hello! I am writing to share a wonderful new resource from the Vital Village Network’s friend and partner, Charles C. Daniels, Jr. Charles is the Founder and CEO of Fathers’ Uplift, which works to assist fathers in overcoming barriers (financial barriers, addiction barriers, oppressive barriers, emotional barriers and traumatic barriers) that prevent them from remaining engaged in their children’s lives. Charles’s book “Pre-Father Care: Prenatal Care for Fathers” is now available for...
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The Traumatic Impact of Racism on Young People and How to Talk About It [Dr. Kenneth Ginsburg]
Dr. Kenneth Ginsburg (Keynote speaker from the recent Creating a Resilient Community Conference) shared the excerpt from his book Reaching Teens titled The Traumatic Impact of Racism on Young People and How to Talk About It. This is a valuable resource for anyone interacting with youth and we are providing the excerpt as an attachment here for you to read and share. Also, Dr. Ginsburg will be coming back to our community (virtually) and you’ll be invited to his workshop. Look out for the...
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White Parents, It's Your Turn to Carry This Burden [newamerica.org]
By Autumn McDonald, New America, June 4, 2020 I date myself with a reference to Rodney King, and I do so intentionally. I was fourteen when he was brutally beaten by LAPD officers; I had no thoughts of kids, or how a parent protects them. But in households around the country, Black parents were having “ the Talk ” with their children— an intense, high-stakes training on the realities of racism— in the hopes of inoculating them against disproportionate police targeting and brutality. My...
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Reassessing our Priorities and Healing during the Pandemic: A Resource
Recently a friend reached out to say they finally got to read through the "Healing Program" on Wrestling Ghosts' Website and how helpful it was. It made me reflect on how the pandemic, like most crises in our lives, can open up the opportunity to reassess our priorities and refocus on our and our families' wellbeing. Healing childhood trauma starts with understanding the impact of toxic stress in childhood. That understanding lifts our shame and self-blame. Then comes visualizing what...
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Unbecoming an Armadillo: Recovering from Trauma with EMDR
Unbecoming an Armadillo By: Victoria F. Burns, PhD, LSW Victoriafrances49@gmail.com Instagram: @betesandbites “When you are traumatized, you are basically in a permanent defensive mode” — Gabor Mate I’m sitting across from Meg on her charcoal grey love seat. My forearms are resting on a velvety mustard-yellow throw cushion and I’m holding crescent shaped pulsers in each hand. Meg’s my psychologist; a rare gem who specializes in chronic illness and trauma. Every two weeks, we spend an hour...
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A Better Normal Community Discussion: Rebecca Lewis-Pankratz on Community, Poverty & Parenting with ACEs: Friday, July 17th at 3p.m. EST
Please join us this Friday, July 17th as we speak with @Rebecca Lewis-Pankratz for our next A Better Normal discussion at 3p.m. EST. This conversation, hosted by @Cissy White (ACEs Connection Staff) and moderated by @Alison Cebulla (ACEs Connection Staff) will be about building community, ending poverty, and and parenting with ACEs. Rebecca will share her personal story as well as her work with families, schools, and communities. Click here to register. About Rebecca's Lewis-Pankratz (in her...
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Coping with Stress During the COVID-19 Pandemic: One-Pager
Coping with Stress During the COVID-19 Pandemic: One-Pager
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Finding Footing on Shifting Sand
I’m struggling to write this blog entry- I’m too preoccupied with thinking about school starting. Instead of focusing on writing, my brain won’t stop running through scenarios given limited and changing facts and circumstances. School starts on August 17, but due to covid 19, Boise School District is delaying the start of “in-person” school and opting for children to attend virtually instead. I’m sure this was a smart move- I’m just as concerned about the health of our community’s children...
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A Listening Curriculum: School Radically Re-imagined in the Time of COVID-19
Symbolic of our quick-fix culture, I was recently asked to do a five-minute radio interview addressing the challenge of remote learning without the peer group dynamics of a regular classroom. The time constraint motivated me to get to the core of the education crisis precipitated by the coronavirus pandemic. Decades of developmental science research reveal that our physical and emotional health- our very sense of self- emerges in moment-to-moment interactions in our social world. The...
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Loving An Orchid: Understanding Child Abuse Trauma's Impact [psychologytoday.com]
By JoAnn Stevelos, Psychology Today, August 21, 2020 As a child, I was an orchid but lived like a dandelion. I have always prided myself on my resiliency, for surviving a long and painful childhood filled with abandonment, psychological, physical, emotional, and sexual abuse . Child abuse can do that to you—give you a false sense of self and what resiliency really looks like. Resiliency is not just surviving. This false narrative of resiliency can take years to undo. One approach is to try...
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With less money and more risk, waves of child-care providers call it quits [latimes.com]
By Rikha Sharma Rani, Los Angeles Times, August 22, 2020 Kirsten Hove and her mom have been taking care of kids in San Francisco for decades. Hove’s mother opened a day-care program in her home in the city’s Marina neighborhood more than 30 years ago. In 2006, Hove and a family friend expanded the business by opening sites in their apartments nearby. The days were long, but the women loved the work. What took years to build, however, was dismantled by the coronavirus in just a few months. [...
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How I Became a Champion for Trauma-Informed Change
I began riding the “trauma-informed care” wave three years prior to realizing I was part of something bigger than my own vision to bust open the conversation on trauma. When my life as a writer, editor, and advocate for parenting survivors of childhood abuse collided with my professional life as a mental health care manager, I knew the universe was trying to tell me something. Having long ago succumbed to the realization that everything really does happen for a reason, I started to see my...