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Parenting with PACEs. PACEs science & stories. Trauma-informed change.

Tagged With "good enough mother"

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School Council, School Improvement Plans, ACEs, Diversity & Help?

Christine Cissy White ·
Dear Parenting with ACEs Community: I'm wondering if anyone has worked ACEs-related language into a School Council School Improvement Plan? I'm on the School Council for a charter school and we're looking at improving parent engagement., in general, and as part of that I'm trying to introduce two topics: 1) ACEs and 2)Race, Class & Parent Involvement We have kids from 30 different communities and 1/3 of the students are Haitian. The other 2/3 are mostly but not entirely Caucasian.
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Being present was the most exhausting part of parenting

Christine Cissy White ·
I used to sneak away for a hot bath as often as possible when my daughter was in the need-me-every-minute years. I'd soak long past when the water went cold and I felt guilty at times but sometimes I needed to be alone. To read poetry. To have some physical space. To exhale. I didn't always know where or how to pamper or self-care myself. There were few adults I trusted. I believed in attachment-style parenting and wanted to be there all of the time. And that even made me feel guilty when I...
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Need opinions about parenting and self-care blog!

Akacia Smith ·
Hi everyone! I've made a blog (not yet launched) called A Resilient Parent (aresilientparent.com). I have a few goals in mind for this blog. First i want to help parents with ACEs heal, so they can thrive themselves. I also believe that whereas the focus is so strongly on this generations kids (for good reason, of course), I feel that outside help can be most effective when the parents are healing as well. Our children look up to their parents/guardians most of all! And it's not to late for...
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Re: Being present was the most exhausting part of parenting

Former Member ·
Just happened to come across your honest sharing. Parenting with ACEs is tough, particularly as a single mom. I constantly struggled to be in the present while so many intrusive thoughts of the past overwhelmed me. There were times, I wished I could just close the mother door. "It wasn't intuitive or automatic. Some of it was natural but much of it was not." The above sentences really hit close to home. I do feel guilty about some of my behavior now. Though thankfully, my son has turned out...
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Re: What Do You Think Parents Need Most When Parenting with ACEs?

Former Member ·
Enough money to survive and not have to sell their body for a place to stay. I'm serious. The destruction of AFDC by the Clintons has significantly worsened severe childhood ACE exposure. My my parents live in cars, have to have emotionally disabled kids to get the few dollars needed to survive via SSI - that means damaged young brains and broken young children. If if we are to take this seriously, we must be politically involved and armed with knowledge. Thanks much more later.
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Re: Need opinions about parenting and self-care blog!

Christine Cissy White ·
Akacia: Hello. Nice to meet you. I'm the Community Manager for this community and I really hope you'll share your blog posts HERE. I think your perspective is key and I appreciate how much you shared. There are over 300 hundred of us here and many of us are parents or work with parents (have ACEs, kids or people we love or work with have ACEs) and we're all learning about trauma informed EVERYTHING and how we can heal and help support and understand our kids and be there for our kids. I love...
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