Skip to main content

The True Power of Community Resiliency Model (CRM) Skills for Foster Youth/Families

 

In 2020 when I first started working with Coastal Horizons, my co-worker Amy talked about the CRM Trainings she was giving.  At that point I was new and wanted to learn more about it so I went to my first 8 hour CRM training. Little did I know this training would become a new way of communicating with the children in my home.

See I am a single kinship/foster/adoptive/birth mother to at least four children, all of which have experience a great deal of trauma. At first I started by using the skills on myself until I felt comfortable enough to walk my boys through some.  I think it was when my then four-year-old was having a challenging time coping with his mother not contacting him, that it dawned on me to try the skills I was using for myself.

I asked him if he wanted to push against a wall with me to try and push it down.  He was surprisingly willing. While I was walking him through noticing how the wall felt, and the sensations in his body he looked at me and said "Granny I don't feel angry any more".

That is when I knew that these skills were going to be used in my home.

Fast forward to April 2nd 2021 we experienced a house fire, in which we lost everything.

As soon as help arrived I had a light bulb go off in my head of Amy talking about neuroplasticity and "what's wired together fires together." Immediately I started pointing out to my three sons who were there, all of the helpers, and looking for what else is true. I pointed out the landlord who came with warm clothing, the firemen and women trying hard to put out the fire, and that we all made it out unharmed.

One of my sons was with his father in another state at the time if the fire. The three boys who were with me and able to look for what else is true and who the helpers were are able to discuss the fire now without having a trauma response, but my 10 year old, who wasn't with us, still has a trauma response when we talk about the fire.

Using CRM and CRM language in my home.

I try to use CRM and CRM language in my home everyday, it has become common language in my home; my children will tell their friends when they seem out of their resilience zone and walk their friends through a CRM skill.

We recently got (as a patient) a 14-year-old young lady who we all have been CRM guides for.  After a challenging conversation with her mother she came to me crying and said "Ms. Kristy, I know I am out of my resilience zone, will you walk me through a skill?"

Screen Shot 2022-09-15 at 3.22.36 PMI gave her options of different skills we could use; she asked me to walk her through taking a sip. When we were finished I asked her what sensations did she notice happen in/to her body.  She said she felt like she could have a conversation with me about the conversation that she had with her mother. I asked her if it was ok if I told her what I noticed, she said yes. I pointed out that I had seen her shoulders drop, and saw that exhaled deeply.  She wiggled her shoulders and said "oh yeah they do feel looser".

Soon she will be going back home, and one thing she tells me is that when she gets home and feels out of her resilience zone, she is now comfortable being able to use the skills to get herself back into her zone.

These are just a few examples of how important it is for youth in Foster/Kinship Care, as well as the caring adults in their lives, to learn these skills.  Just one person going to a training has the trickle effect to touch at least 100 different lives for the better!

Resources: https://www.traumaresourceinstitute.com/crm-workshopsScreen Shot 2022-09-15 at 3.14.51 PM

Attachments

Images (2)
  • Screen Shot 2022-09-15 at 3.14.51 PM
  • Screen Shot 2022-09-15 at 3.22.36 PM

Add Comment

Comments (0)

Copyright ÂĐ 2022, PACEsConnection. All rights reserved.
×
×
×
×
Link copied to your clipboard.
×