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The best way to start any meeting. Ever.

 

Following a brief mindfulness check-in, PACEs Connection staff meetings begin with the review of our Vision, Mission, and Values statements, as well as our Equity and Inclusion Statement. At a recent meeting, top row, L-R, Ingrid Cockhren, Carey Sipp, Donielle Prince, Jane Stevens. Middle row, L-R, John Flores, Porter Jennings-McGarity, Jenna Quinn, Gail Kennedy. Bottom row, L-R, Rafael Maravilla, Natalie Audage, Alison Cebulla, Samantha Sangenito.



A couple of times last week I felt my body downshift to a more comfortable lower gear, the way it has several thousand times over the course of 26 years. This happens when I’ve “claimed” my seat at meetings for people recovering from having lived in the chaos and trauma of addiction, or in meetings for people who want help with their own addictions.

Many recovery meetings open with the oft-quoted Serenity Prayer, which asks petitioners to be granted “the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we need can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” We read the beautiful Promises of Alcoholics Anonymous, or a version of it appropriate to whatever group is meeting, along with the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions.

This “meeting norm” of reading through the mission of why we are there, the vision of what we’ll gain if we “keep coming back” and the 24 behavioral milestones of theTwelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions has served, for my central nervous system, as a signal to let down. Relax. Open my mind. Open my heart. Trust it is safe to be where I am and who I am and to speak my peace. Here I am welcomed, accepted, loved, appreciated before I am even known. Though I may be only tolerated by some, love and kindness is the code. With spiritual help I won’t “act out” or ask for special treatment as here I am “a worker among workers.” Though were I to act out, my loving accountability partners would likely not do so much judging as they would gently nudge to help me remember to look for “my part” in whatever is setting me off. It is a model for living that I love and treasure. And it helps the group focus, center, get in sync, and oftentimes come to a collective gratitude.

Gratitude was the feeling I had last week when at two PACEs Connection meetings. The first was a meeting with a couple of statewide organizers, one of whom had been through a harrowing week of family illness. The other was our weekly PACEs Connection staff update during which several of us expressed disappointment and exasperation about the increase in COVID-19 cases. Both meetings began by reading, out loud, the PACEs Connection Vision and Mission statements as well as our Values and our Equity and Inclusion Statement.

Our Vision

A resilient world where all people thrive.

Our Mission

The human and digital catalyst that grows and supports the worldwide PACEs and resilience movement, and tells its authentic stories.

Equity & Inclusion Statement

PACEs Connection is an anti-racist organization committed to the pursuit of social justice.

In our work to promote resilience and prevent and mitigate ACEs, we will intentionally embrace and uplift people who have historically not had a seat at the table. PACEs Connection will celebrate the voices and tell the stories of people who have been barred from decision making and who have shouldered the burden of systemic and economic oppression as the result of genocide, slavery, family separation, forced relocation, mass incarceration, red lining and all other practices, policies and institutions that have traumatized marginalized groups. These groups include people of color, people living with mental health and substance use challenges, people living with disabilities, and members of the LGBTQI community.

Our Values

As individuals and as an organization, it is our intention and daily practice to encourage and model these core values:

Integrity. Transparency.

Equity. Inclusion.  

Empathy. Compassion.  

Joy. Celebration.

Courage.

Integrity. Transparency. We manage through trust not control. To create trust and an accountable environment where everyone feels they can say what needs to be said when it needs to be said, we maintain an environment free from hidden agendas or conditions, accompanied by full information and no fear of retaliation. We speak directly, do what we say we will do and have pure motives. We contribute authentically and participate fully. We are leaders and we model leadership at every level.

Equity. Inclusion.  We regularly examine our roles in perpetuating inequitable systems and work to change inequitable practices, structures and policies that contribute to ACEs, and maintain an environment where everyone is welcomed, respected, supported and valued.

Empathy. Compassion.  We value empathy, which validates the experiences of others and is born from compassion.

Joy. Celebration.  We cultivate resilience and equanimity by sharing the truth of our stories and celebrating our lessons learned and our successes.

Courage. Knowing that we, ourselves, are the foundation for our success and the key to achieving our vision, we encourage and provide opportunities for personal growth and professional advancement and satisfaction. Our courage is grounded in the body and is a measure of our heartfelt participation in life, with one another, and with our work.

Something about reading these grounding, encouraging, compelling words centered us.

In several meetings of PACEs Connection communities in the Southeast, where I am our organization’s regional coordinator, readers begin with their own community’s vision and mission statements. They take a few minutes to check in and establish their meeting norms, including one person speaking at a time, staying on topic, etc.

The communities that open meetings with their vision, mission and some form of meeting norms tend to advance their PACEs science movements with focus and energy. There is purpose, cooperation, energy, effectiveness.

Does your community begin its meetings with a vision and mission, or words that unify and inspire your members? If you do, please post them in the comments. With more than 400 communities on PACEs Connection, I’d love to learn about the different ways we all begin.

How we end—in a world where all people thrive—depends on how we begin.

To me, this is a given: The 10 minutes we take to start our meetings are vitally important to help us start on the same page, to share a mental model of what we’re working for, to work together for our common goal.  

Thank you for all you do in your home, community, and the world to help prevent and heal trauma, and to lead us toward a more healing-centered and just society.

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