John Sharp is a psychiatrist and professor at Harvard Medical School. In his book Insight Cure, Sharp includes ACEs science in his exploration of how traumatic events from childhood may turn into what he calls a "false truth" (such as "I am unlovable") that then turns into a maladaptation that can plague an individual for life. His book outlines an 8-step program to help readers shine the light of awareness on these false truths that so many of us harbor based on early childhood experiences.

But, he says, unlocking these doors is difficult. He writes that "taking comfort in unhealthy familiarity and deeply embedded compromises are like heavy chains around your neck that you've been carrying for so long you don't even notice they're there. Some patients are aware of their chains when they start therapy, but most aren't. Nearly all of them have turned their chains into protection. They'd rather carry the burden than feel vulnerable without it. You know you're really ready to change when the burden becomes too great and too painful to carry any longer."

Or, as DW Winnicott once wrote, alluding, perhaps, to these defenses that protect us: "It is a joy to be hidden, but a disaster not to be found."

For more info: https://www.amazon.com/Insight-Cure